


When Wounds Run Deep

by ElmOak1991



Category: New Girl
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-01
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-03-12 10:29:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 30,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13545465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElmOak1991/pseuds/ElmOak1991
Summary: Three years after moving from the loft Jessica's life is a mess. She ran away from her abusive husband, and feels scared and lost. After turning to her friends for help, she  has a long road to recovery because the wounds she could see were only the beginning. Nick plans on being there every step of the way, no matter how hard Jess tries to push him out. No matter what is thrown their way, because losing her again is not an option.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fan fiction is not for people who are easily triggered. It deals with domestic violence and rape. I'm not going to make a hundred tags on what may or may not happen. Please if your offended or triggered easily be aware this fic might not be for you. Everyone else, please enjoy :D

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

 

 Jess stood on the sidewalk, looking up at the loft she had lived in three years ago. The memories that plagued her made her eyes swim with tears, and her lips smile with happiness. Those six years had really been some of the best years of her life. She never regretted her decision to move into a loft with three guys, and while it was odd at first, and there was a lot of adjustments, she had loved living with them. Not only had they become family, but they had given her six great years.

She wiped at the tears that slid down her cheeks, as she began making her way to the bus stop not too far from there. She was only in L.A for a few days, and she was already late getting to Cece's. They never get to have enough time together, so there wasn't any time to waste.

Jess watched as L.A flashed by the bus window. She missed this. The sights, the people. She had fled from Portland, wanting new and exciting experiences, only to end up back there. Three years ago she had intended to spend the summer there, and come back to L.A when school started again, but life happened, and three years later she was trying not to let regret settled In her heart. If she allowed herself to feel regret, then she would feel guilty because she had a life with her husband in Portland.

"Oh my god! You're here!" Cece exclaimed, pulling Jess in for a bear hug. The two squealed as they embraced. "I have missed you so much!"

"Me too!" Jess replied. She looked over at Lana who had come to investigate the noise. "Oh my god! How have you gotten so big?" Jess asked the two year old.

"Aunt Jess!" the toddler said happily, going to them as fast as her little legs could go. She grabbed Jess' legs, giving them a tight hug.

Come one," Cece said, taking one of Jess' bags. "Let's get you settled."

The two talked on their way to the guest room. Just the usual, how have you been? And What's new? The usual small talk you used as you were still getting settled. After Jess' bags were unpacked, and Lana was settled down for her nap, Jess found herself sitting at the breakfast nook, spreading mayo on bread as Cece cut up a tomato.

"So, have you talked to Mitch about moving here yet? I need my best friend to be closer. I've had it with this long distance thing." Cece said, giving Jess a smile, but stopped when Jess' mood dampened. "Jess?" she asked, as Jess started to tear up.

She shook her head as she tried to compose herself. "It…"I'm okay. He…is not interested in moving. So." she shrugged. She hated that Mitch wouldn't budge on the subject, but she had no intention to bring it up again.

"Jess, why are you with him again?" Cece asked, knowing she was putting her foot in something Jess had made clear in the past was off limits.

"I love him. Why do we always have to do this? Why can't we just enjoy the time we have together?"

"Because," Cece replied, as she put the tomatoes on the sandwiches. "He's a jerk who doesn't deserve the love of my best friend."

"Look, I really appreciate where this is coming from, But I don't want to fight. So can we just agree to disagree. He's not the monster you seem to think he is."

Cece waited a beat, then nodded. "Fine." Cece took a deep breath. "Agree to disagree."

They finished making the sandwiches, and settled onto the couch. The talked about everything and anything as they ate, and both were reminded why they were best friends. It was nice to be able to spend so much time apart, but once reunited, it was like they were never apart at all.

"So Schmidt was red as a lobster because he'd thought he was using sun screen, but it was just lotion," Cece was saying, but she stopped mid story as Jess leaned over to grab her drink from the coffee table. "What's on your arm?"

"What?" Jess asked, giving Cece and innocent look.

Cece grabbed her arm, and pulled the sleeve back to reveal a large bruise. "He's hitting you?" she asked, her blood running cold, and then was quickly boiling as anger took over.

Jess tried to pull her arm away, but Cece had a good drip. "Let go Cece." Jess demanded.

"No until you tell my what the hell happened!"

Jess fumbled over words as she tried to come up with a lie until a sentenced formed. "I fell down the stairs. I missed the step because I was carrying down the laundry."

Cece let out a huffed laugh as she shook her head. "I can't believe this. Are you kidding me right now? Do you think I'm stupid?"

"It's was an accident. Accidents happen all the time Cece."

Cece let out a laugh that was more disbelief then humorous. "Really?" she asked as she let Jess' arm go. "That's what you're going with?"

"What's going on?" Schmidt asked, alerting both girls of his presence. And Nicks.

Jess felt her heart jump, then sink. It had been a year since she had laid eyes on him last, and her heart still fluttered like a school girls did.

"Jess is in major denial that her husband his a complete and total dick." Cece stood and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I'm not in denial of anything! You have been nothing but judgmental toward him since the first time you met him." Jess yelled back, also standing.

"Yeah, Jess. That might have something to do with the fact that he told you that he didn't want you to be yourself when you guys went to his office party. He told you to tone down the Jess." Cece added air quotes around the words. "And when he took you to meet his parent? He told you to act like a normal person! Who wants a guy who won't let you be yourself?"

"He said that because he is a business man and I can be a bit much. And his parents are prudes! He was trying to help."

"If he doesn't want you just the way you are, then he's crazy. You're perfect," Nick cut in before he could stop the words from escaping his lips. God he missed her.

"No one asked you, Miller." Jess said, as she walked past him a Schmidt to the guest room. She wasn't doing this. She didn't need to explain herself to any of them. Mitch wasn't a monster. He was sweet and Romantic. She didn't want for nothing, and he made her feel like she was the only girl in the world.

"We can't let her go back to him," Cece said. She looked in the direction of the guest room with worry.

"We can't stop her," Schmidt replied, running his hands down her arms, then took her hands.

"I mean, we could…" Nick said, but stopped because this matter couldn't be made light of. He felt a raw anger toward the man who put that bruise on Jess.

"Where is Auntie Jess going?" Lana asked, as she stood in the doorway, rubbing her eye.

Jess paused at the front door. She would have made it out without them knowing if Lena hadn't caught her. She put down her bags, and went to Lana. "I have to get back home. Something unexpected came up." Jess hugged Lana.

"Jess, please don't go," Cece pleaded. "We can talk about this."

Jess straighten. "You know, I think we've drifted. Maybe it's best to end this here and now." She retrieved her bags as her heart broke. "There's nothing let in Los Angeles for me. I don't think I will be coming back." With that, she left.

Cece stood, stunned into silence. It wasn't until Schmidt held her tight that she realized she was crying. "I don't understand. How doesn't she see it?"

"I don't know," Schmidt said, rubbing her back in soothing circles. He looked at Nick over her shoulder, and was glad that Nick understood he wanted to be alone with her. He left through the kitchen door.

"How could she just write me off like that? We have been best friends forever." Cece shook her head. "I never expected this from her. Not ever."

"Well… people change."

Cece pulled away because she realized that Lana was still watching. "Hey, sweetie," Cece said as she scooped Lana up into her arms. Why don't we go to the park? Maybe get an ice cream after?"

"Okay!" Lana said excitedly. "Daddy too?"

Schmidt smiled as he took Lana from Cece. "Yeah Sweetheart, daddy too."

* * *

 

 "Jess!" Nick called out as he caught up to her.

"Go away, Nick!" Jess snapped. She didn't want to do this. Not with him.

"No," Nick said, as he grabbed her unbruised arm and spun her around. "What the hell was that back there? She's your best friend."

"I don't have to explain myself to you Nick Miller!" Jess pushed him away. She hated that he made her feel weepy. Like she could just unload all her pain, but she was stronger than that, and she deserved this bruise.

"Who are you?" Nicked asked. He couldn't believe this. The Jess in front of him wasn't the one he'd once knew. The one he was still in love with.

Jess felt like she got smacked in the face. Not because she felt he was being unreasonably mean, because he wasn't. It wasn't even because he screamed at her, because he didn't. The words were spoken in a soft tone barely louder than a whisper. And they stopped her in her tracks. They seeped into her skin.

"I'm me, Nick! This is just the me I couldn't be stuck in a loft with three immature boys." she snapped. It was harsh, but she was angry that they were making her second guess Mitch. She was happy, and had a gorgeous home. Her husband took care of her.

"No," Nick said with a shake of his head. "The Jess I knew was a strong woman who would never be with a man that hits her."

Jess let out an a sound of disbelief. "You don't know anything about my life, Miller. And you never will. Mitch is a good man, and he isn't some man/child hybrid. He knows what he wants and takes it, and he isn't afraid of the future."

"You know, burning all your bridges in one day isn't the way to go. You're going to look back, and none of us are going to be there!"

"Good! I don't need you guys anyway!" With that, she started off again. At first she was thankful that Nick didn't follow after her. But as she was getting into the cab that would take her home, she wished Nick would have stopped her, because while she was ashamed to admit it, she was sure who she was anymore, and that scared her.

 

* * *

 

"We can't do anything unless she reports the incident to the police," Aly said, as she sat next to Winston. "I'm sorry Nick."

"The guy left a bruise on our friend, and we are going to sit back and do nothing?" Nick asked, repulsed and frustrated. Letting her walk away was the hardest thing he ever had to do.

"Nick, I am upset too. But Aly is right. If we tried to get involved, and Jess did in fact fall down the stairs, we could lose our badges. If she won't report the abuse, we can't lawfully get involved.

"So the hand shaped bruise on her arm means nothing?" Nick stood needing to move.

How could he just sit there and do nothing? It didn't matter that it had been years since Jess was his, he still had a strong urge to protect her. He still loved her. And he was still hurt by the way she left L.A in the first place. She just packed up her bags, and walked out of his life. She didn't say goodbye. Didn't give an explanation as to why she left. She wouldn't take his calls. Not that it stopped him from calling every night to tell her about his day. Even now he left her voicemails, even though he was never sure she listened to any of them.

"I can't sit back and do nothing." Nick informed them.

"Look," Winston said, not liking the look on Nick's face. He had never seen the anger so strong before. "Let me see what I can do. I have a buddy who works in Portland. I will have him run the guy, and see if there is any reason to investigate. Okay?"

Nick nodded, figuring that was probably the best he was going to get. It was better than nothing. "You guys want to stay for dinner? I was going to order Italian."

"Oh," Aly said, scrunching up her face. "I would love to stay, but not for Italian."

Nick's brows pulled together. "I thought you love Italian?"

"Oh, She does. The growing baby however doesn't." Winston replied, putting his hand on Aly's swollen belly.

"Yep. Thank god I only have a month left. I am done not eating the foods I've always liked to eat."

"What do you guys want then?" Nick really didn't want to be alone.

"Fear not," Schmidt said, as he walked into the loft, followed by Cece and Lena. "We come with Thai food."

"Yes! That sounds amazing." Aly said, as she help him with the bags.

"Hey, I didn't know you guys were coming over," Nick said, as Schmidt put the food backs on the table.

"It was my idea." Cece replied. "I figured we could all use some time together."

"Agreed!" Winston said.

A comfortable ciaos took place as everyone grabbed plates, cups, silverware, and whatever else might be needed for the feast. Everyone laughed and talked as the food was passed around. Cece and Aly were busy talking about boy names, and everyone else kept cutting in. So far Danny, Oscar, Peter, Kevin, George, and Marvin were a no go.

Even though laughter and the joyous sounds of friends filled the loft, there was still a settle weight that made the mood darker then it usually would be. Everyone was worried for Jess, and they all were busy thinking about ways to help her.

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	2. Chapter two

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

 

...

Jess stood in her hotel room, looking out the window, watching people come and go. There were people splashing around in the pool down below, and she watched as the man went up behind the woman and hugged her close. The woman's smile made Jess want to cry.

Cece was right. She was in an abusive relationship, and she had no clue how she ended up there. Mitch was the perfect man. He was sexy, charming, and kind. She hit the jackpot the day she had bumped into him at Cole's Café. Or, at least she had always thought so.

How had she missed the signs? How had she not seen the settle ways he controlled her? Changed her? The way he would put her down by hiding it in a complement? He played her, and he played her good. She was madly, truly and happily in love with him.

Her reality was shattered about four months ago when she found out he was cheating on her. She had confronted him, furious that this had happened to her once again. She cried and yelled, and he cried and begged for forgiveness. After a long night of crying, yelling, talking, and make-up sex, she had decided to give him another chance. She wasn't ready to say goodbye. Yeah, stupid.

Two weeks after that, Cece joked, once again, that she and Mitch should move to L.A. They both laughed it off, but Jess decided that maybe it was a good idea. It could give them a fresh start. And it wasn't like they couldn't afford the move. And she could start teaching again. Though, now that she thought about it, she wasn't sure why she stopped in the first place.

Later that night while they ate dinner she brought the move up. She told him it would be a new beginning, and she missed teaching, and there were a few openings in L.A. Mitch got angry. He was mad that she didn't think he could support her. He yelled at her, asking if she had ever wanted for anything while she was with him. She argued back, saying it had nothing to do with money. She missed working. And she missed her friends.

The conversation took an unexpected turn when Mitch went even colder. He asked if it had anything to do with Nick? Jess sat there stunned. She only mention Nick a few times in the beginning, but she didn't much like to think about him, so why was he bringing it up? She asked what he was talking about, and he revealed that he knew she wrote about him often in her diary, and that Nick left voicemails.

That of course upset Jess, and she told him that he wasn't to ever read her diary again. It was privet, and he had no right to it. That was when he grabbed her arm so tight she thought he was going to break it. He yanked her around a bit as he told her that she belonged to him, and he was allowed to do whatever he wanted when it came to her. At that point she was crying from the pain, and didn't say anything in fear that he would hurt her further. No one had ever been physical with her before.

The next day he brought her flowers, and a necklace, promising her that he would never do anything like that again. He promised her that it was just a lapse in judgement, and he was afraid to lose her to an old flame. She was dumb enough to believe him. He had just seemed so sincere, and he had given her sad eyes.

After she got back from Cece's things were okay for about a month, but then it all went to hell. Mitch began coming home drunk, and he would be mean. She tried telling him that he was drinking too much, but it only pissed him off. This was something they'd fought about before. She overlooked the fact that he hit the bottle a bit too much, but now it seemed far worse. It was after the weekend that he was MIA for the entire weekend that things took an even worse turn. They had an all-out fight about where he had been. She learned he had cheated again, and she decided she was done.

She packed all the things she needed, and was going to go beg Cece for forgiveness. Mitch had woken up as she was leaving, and before she could get out the front door, he stopped her. He pushed her around a bit, even hit her hard enough for her to see stars. Told her that if she ever left he would be sure she regretted it. He threatened to hurt the ones she loved, and dared her to think he couldn't do it and get away with it. After all, money bought freedom.

Jess had never been so afraid of anyone in her life, and as he pointed out, he had money, so she was sure he could do a lot of damage. She stayed with him for another six weeks, and they were hell. She tried to stay on his good side, but he was still abusive. She was ashamed to admit that the signs were there in the past, and she just ignored them.

Cece was right about the way he put her down. The way he changed her. Nick's words kept repeated in her head. "Who are you?" She didn't know. She had no damn clue who she was. A stranger looked back at her when she looked in the mirror. A sad, pathetic image replaced the once strong and fearless image she used to see.

It got to where she couldn't even stand to look at Mitch. Her perfect marriage was nothing but a lie, and she resented him for that. Two nights ago he wanted to have sex, and she rejected him. He told her she was his wife, and she had no choice in the matter. She told him to go screw someone else, because she was done with that wifely duty.

His smacked her around for that, but allowed her to leave the room. She sat on the sofa, and cried. He found her there, a cigar in his mouth. She sat stiffly as he sat next to her. He tried again for sex, and again she rejected him. That was when he held her down, and burned her with the cigar. More than once. She finally managed to get away, and used the lamp to knock him out. She grabbed her purse and car keys, a bag of essentials she packed for just this occasion, then fled.

After stopping at the bank to withdraw money, she drove hours until she got here. And now she was unsure what her next steps should be. She was planning on going straight to L.A, but he would know to look there, and she didn't want to put them in harm's way. Especially because of Lana. Her dad was a bad choice because he was in Portland. Her mom might be a good option, but she didn't want to put her in danger either. She kept trying to tell herself that he was all talk. That he wouldn't go after her family, but she couldn't be sure.

She didn't even know just how far he would go to get her back. Hell, she couldn't know that he was even alive. She hit him hard enough to make him bleed. But still, she couldn't risk it. So here she was, scared shitless in a hotel room, unsure of what she was going to do next.

Jess sighed, as she went to the bags of essentials she bought. She might as well try to get some sleep since she was dead on her feet. As she undressed, she caught her reflection in the mirror. The burns hurt like a bitch, and they stood out, an angry red color on her skin. There were nine all together, and the three on her hip and the two breast hurt the worst. They were the deepest. But the one on her neck and stomach was not too far behind in the deep department. The one on her thigh was almost as bad. The one on her arm wasn't anywhere as bad as the rest.

Jess dressed in the night gown, trying to will the tears away. She didn't want to cry anymore. She didn't bother with underwear, because the burn on her hip hurt too much. After turning the TV one, she couldn't stand laying in a quiet dark room, she settled into bed. She put on Friends, and watch it until she fell into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

 

Jess woke in a haze. Her heart was racing, and she felt fear, but for a heartbeat she couldn't understand why. After a moment, everything came back to her clearly. She was leaving the hotel early in the morning when he attacked her from behind. He beat the shit out of her, and now they were driving.

She was in the back seat, trying not to alert him that she had come to. How was she going to get out of this? She ached all over, and it took everything she had to keep from throwing up.

"Did you really think you could leave me, bitch?" Mitch asked, his voice strained.

Jess said nothing. What could she say? No, she didn't think she actually would, but she had to try. She should have called Cece . At least then someone would know she was in trouble, but now she was utterly alone, and she was afraid she wouldn't see tomorrow.

"You are mine!" Mitch said, sounding crazed. "I married you! I have kept a roof over your head, and food in your belly! How dare you leave!"

Jess cried silently, afraid to even let out the smallest of sounds. What was he going to do with her now? From where she lay she couldn't see where they were going, and she didn't dare move. Was he going to take her home and make her submit? Was he going to take her to some secluded place and hold her hostage where she couldn't get away or call for help? Maybe he would just kill her out right. The thoughts made her queasy, and she had to take deep breaths to keep from losing her breakfast.

Neither of them said anything after that. Jess stayed were she was, waiting for more anger. Waiting for him to threaten her with all the things he planned on doing to her. She waited for him to tell her that he was going to take her into the woods and shoot her dead, leaving her body for the wild animals. Hell, she expected more of anything other than silence, and the silence was worse than the yelling.

After a while she drifted into an uneasy sleep, jerking awake after having nightmares that involved Mitch showing her exactly what he planned to do next. Most of the time, Jess loved that she had a good imagination, right now wasn't one of those times.

Once the sun began to fall, and Jess' body ached from the beating, and being in the same position too long, she felt the car begin to slow. She almost asked what they were doing, but she caught herself. No need to make him more angry then he already was.

After about ten minutes of stop and go, Mitch turned right into a cheap motel of some kind. The sign was broken, so jess couldn't make out the name. "We are going to go sign in. You say a word, you show in any way that you are distressed, it'll be the last thing you do."

There's that threatening she had been wait for. She nodded her understanding, and after having a hoodie put on her, he took her hand and led her into the crappy lobby. At first she wondered why he had stopped at a cheap motel when he usually stayed at a high priced place, but after a minute she realized she would stick out at a hotel like the Hilton. Someone would notice her distress even if she kept it to herself. Were as here, in the run down motel for those who probably don't have much of anything, she blended in better. Hell, given the look of the guy who was checking them in, she'd bet no one would even care.

The room was dingy and smelled of mold and cheap perfume. The bed was poorly made, and she wouldn't be surprised if they were the same sheets that last week's guest stayed on. She stood by the bed, her arms crossed over her chest, as Mitch moved about.

She jumped a little when he put his hand on her shoulder. She hated that she feared him. Hated more that she couldn't hide the fact. "You're afraid of me," Mitch said with a laugh. "Good," he whispered into her ear, emphasizing the D.

Jess stiffened as he hugged her to him. She didn't want to have sex with him, but she knew she would be too afraid to say no. She was just too tired to fight. Thankfully he moved away.

"Take a shower, you smell," he said as he sat on the bed, which let out a creaking groan.

Jess did as she was told, and was glad to be out of his sight. She took one look in the mirror and could hardly recognize herself. She had to put her hand over her mouth to muffle the sob that escaped her. Shame washed over her as she turned away from her reflection. She couldn't believe she allowed this to happen.

The shower was both welcomed and painful. She felt like she washed his smell from her skin, but with all the cuts, burns, and bruises, it was painful. Even the water hitting her skin hurt. Still, she showered long enough for the hot water to run out. She was in no rush to finish.

Once she grew cold from standing under cold water, she turned off the shower, and stepped out. She could hear Mitch's muffled voice. After a second of listening, she figured he was on the phone because his voice was the only one she heard.

Jess wrapped in a towel, and opened the door just a crack. To her advantage, the bathroom door was hidden by a small part of the wall that jetted out. His voice was clear now, and she listened, hoping to hear what he might be planning next.

"I've done it this time. She's never going to forgive me." There was a pause as whoever was on the other line spoke. "This isn't the same as it was with Willa. I never beat her. I just knocked her around every now and again. I paid that whore off, and that was that." Again anther pause. "Will, that's the biggest problem, she is black and blue. If she goes to the cops…." He stopped mid-sentence. "She's my wife, Will! I love her! She's not like the others. They were just toys. I tried to change for her, but she makes me so crazy! No! I won't give her up…Fuck you, Will. You're no goddamn help!"

Jess heard what she assumed was his phone hitting the wall, and she decided now would be a good time to make herself known. She didn't want him to think she was listening in. She walked out, trying to give him a smile. She wasn't sure how well she did, but at least she tried.

If he was afraid to lose her, maybe she could use that to her advantage. If killing her wasn't his end game, then she had something to work with, right?

"I'm sorry I tried to leave. I was just upset, and being rash." She said this as she picked up the first shirt she saw in the open suitcase. "You mind?" she asked, moving her hand to indicate what she was talking about. She used to wear his shirts all the time, and she was hoping it would ease him.

"Of course," he replied, after an intense moment of silence. "I left your suitcase behind, so you don't have much of a choice."

Mitch settled into a chair as she put the shirt on. She felt violated as he watch her, but she needed to play it cool. Needed to find a way out of this. "You want to watch TV? Or maybe get to sleep?"

"Jess," Mitch said, halting her efforts to get into the bed.

"Yes?" she asked, her tone barely a whisper. He had said her name in a chilling way.

"Don't you ever try leaving me again. We clear?"

You know that saying "if looks could kill?" Well if the tone in his voice could kill, she would be dead.

Jess had to swallow back the fear as she nodded. "Yes. I will never leave you again."

Mitch sat in the chair as she turned on the TV. She flipped through the channels before settling for one of the car shows Mitch enjoyed. She wished she could sleep, but every time her eyes fell closed, she jerked awake. She was too afraid to sleep.

It was two thirty in the morning when Mitch stood. He seemed on edge again. He paced for a while before stopping at the foot of the bed. "I'm going on a drink run."

"Okay," Jess replied. She wanted to remind him that no one would sell him alcohol at this time in the morning, but she figured that would just piss him off.

Mitch grabbed her ankles hard enough for her to feel pain. "If you even think about leaving, I will kill you. I will kill everyone you love. You hear me?"

Jess nodded, and let out a fake yawn. "I don't plan on doing anything but sleep. Don't be gone too long. This place gives me the creeps." Jess made a show of drooping eyes. She could feel him watch her, but eventually he either figured she wasn't going anywhere, or the need for a drink got strong enough that he left. She thanked god he didn't make her go with him.

Jess laid their undecided of what she should do. What if he was testing her? He could be standing outside the door, waiting for her to try and leave. But what if he had really gone? This could be her chance of escaping. But where would she go? She was too afraid to call the cops. If she was being honest with herself, she would know that she wanted more than anything to call Nick. She wanted the comfort he always seemed to give her. He had a way of making her feel okay even when she wasn't. But she wasn't doing that. Not after the three years she spent avoiding him. Cece. She would call Cece.

She still hesitated. She could be putting them in harm's way. Involving Cece could be a bad idea. But what else could she do? And really, what could Mitch do? He wasn't superhuman after all. Right? So he couldn't really do much. Right?

Slowly Jess got out of the bed, tiptoeing to the window before she lost her nerve. They were on the first floor, and after moving the curtain over, she could see that the car was actually gone. For the first time ever, she thanked the lord that Mitch was an alcoholic. He needed the drink more than he feared her leaving.

She grabbed a pair of his boxers, and quickly put them on. She paused when she saw the cash, and decided she might need it. Her heart pounded as she opened the window. She felt silly climbing out of it, but she felt like using the door was too risky. This way, she wouldn't be seen by the desk clerk. Once she was out, she fled. Her heart hammered in her chest, but she had to ignore that voice that told her she was crazy. The voice that told her she needed to get back into that motel room before Mitch found her gone.

"No!" she said to herself, as she pushed away the scared part of herself. She wasn't going to fold. She had a moment of weakness, and now she had a chance to be strong.

She had no idea where she was going, but she needed to find a safe place with a phone. After a while, she settled on another motel. This one was only a couple miles from the last one, but she needed to get inside. She moved her hair to cover most of her face, and was thankful that the woman asked no questions. And to her surprise, she didn't have to give any sort of identification either. Jess all but ran to her room, and once inside she locked the door, and made sure the windows were locked as well, and drew the curtains closed.

She looked around the room, and shivered. On her way to this motel, she discovered she was only a couple hours away from L.A. She wasn't sure what Mitch was thinking when he drove her out of Oregon, but she was thankful for it. Being so close would make it easier for Cece to come get her. With a shaky hand, she picked up the phone, and dialed the number.

* * *

 

Schmidt cursed as the phone startled him awake. At first he assumed that it was his cell going off, but after a moment, he realized it was Cece's. The number was unknown, which annoyed him. It was three in the morning.

"Hello?" he asked, annoyed. There was silence on the other line, so he said hello again.

"Oh, I was hoping to reach Cece," Jess said. Schmidt sat up, alarmed by how Jess sounded. He could tell she had been crying.

"Jess? Are you okay?"

"Can I just talk to Cece?" Jess asked.

"She's not here. She's as an interview in New York, and she accidently left her cell here. Jess, what's wrong?"

Jess Sobbed, unable to stop herself. She really wished she could talk to Cece, but she had to put her pride away. "I'm in trouble. I need someone to come get me."

Schmidt was out of bed, already pulling his pants on. He had an idea of what may be happening, and the idea made him sick to his stomach. Cece had been right about Mitch. "Are you home? I will go get you."

"No actually, I'm at a motel in Bakersfield," Jess replied, then gave him an address.

"Okay, be there as soon as I can," Schmidt said, as he texted the nanny on his cell.

"Schmidt, I'm…"Jess broke off as she choked on her words. The fear overtaking her. What if Mitch found her before he got there?

"It's okay, Jess. I'm coming."

...

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	3. Chapter Three

**Disclaimer: I don’t own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

 

Fifteen minutes after he hung up with Jess, he was on the road. Thank god for Anita. She was a saint of a woman.

 

The two hour long drive felt like it took forever, but in actuality, he made it in good time. Because Jess never gave him a room number, he had to talk to the woman, who willy nilly gave him a key to Jess' room after he described her. If he weren't in a hurry, he would give her a piece of his mind.

 

He used the key to the room he prayed was Jess'. The room was dark, so he called out her name.

 

"Schmidt?" A voice came from the other side of the bed. He walked around the bed and found her.

 

"Oh thank god it’s you," Jess said, from the floor. She was tucked in the space between the wall and bed. Terrified.

 

Schmidt went to her, and the light outside the window showed him just how much of a mess she was. "Oh Jess," he breathed as she began to weep. She was covered in bruises and cuts. He wouldn’t have believed someone could have so many at once. On her neck he could see what looked like a burn and his stomach rolled. Jesus.

 

He helped her up carefully holding her to him. This both pissed him off and broke his heart. That son of a bitch wasn't going to get away with this.

 

"I thought you were him," Jess said into his chest.

 

"It's okay, I've got you. You're safe now."

 

"Do you have a bag or anything?" he asked, getting a shake of the head in return.

 

Schmidt lead her to the car, and soon they were on their way to L.A. He kept glancing at her, unable to help himself. She sat immobile in the passenger seat. She didn’t speak a word, or turn on the radio. She didn’t do anything but look blankly out of the windshield. He tried talking her into going to the hospital, but she shot him down quick on that one. So homeward bound they were.

 

It was a little past seven in the morning by the time they got home. Jess waited for Schmidt to unlock the door, before going right to the guest room. Still she said nothing. Schmidt couldn't remember a time when Jess had gone so long without talking obsessively. He also never thought he would miss it, but he truly did.

 

"Oh Dear," Anita said, with a sad look on her face. "He will get his," she added, before sending up a silent prayer.

 

"Yes," Schmidt said, as he handed Anita the money he owed her.

 

Anita refused it, shaking her head at him. "No, you keep that. The angle slept the entire time, and I got some school work done. I will not take the money," she added when he started to argue. "You tell Jess that the bastard will get what's coming to him." She patted Schmidt's cheek before grabbing her purse, and leaving.

 

Schmidt checked on Lana before looking in on Jess. She just sat on the bed, staring off into space. He didn’t know what to say to her. Didn’t know how to make it better. After spending a while debating, he decided he needed backup.

 

First he called Cece, who would be on the first plane back to L.A. Then he called Winston, figuring out would be easier for jess to file a report to a friend. Because she would be filing whether or not she wanted too. Cece called back, saying it would be at least six hours before she could get home. It was then he decided to call Nick.

 

"Dude, It's six in the morning," Nick answered with a groan.

 

"Nick, we have a situation."

* * *

 

Nick sat up in bed, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "What is it?" he asked, a little annoyed. He had only gotten to sleep a few hours ago.

 

"Jess called me at three this morning. She was distressed and about two hours away and needed to be picked up."

 

"Is she hurt?" Nick asked, now fully awake, and already pulling on pants. He knew that the answer was going to be yes, because otherwise why would Schmidt be calling?

 

"He beat her. She's a freaking mess, and I don’t know how to help her. Cece is trying to get here ASAP, but that could be hours."

 

"I'll be right over," Nick replied. He was already pulling on his shoes.

 

Nick hung up the phone, and had to take a few calming breaths. That son of a bitch! That mother fucking son of a bitch. He paced the living room because he was too angry to do anything else. He beat her? No hit her, but beat her? Nick's heart broke as he imagined it. As he thought of Mitch putting his hands on Jess. He hit her.

 

Anger burned in him, and he was unsure how to keep calm. How not to go hunt down the piece of shit, and give him a beat down of his own. But knowing Jess needed him kept him at bay. For now anyway.

 

Once he felt like he could see straight again, he drove over to Schmidt's. He walked in and found Schmidt cooking breakfast and a happy Lana humming away at the table. She clearly didn't know or didn’t understand what was going on, and he was glad for it. She didn’t need that kind of horror in her life.

 

"Untol Nick!" she said once she spotted him, mispronouncing uncle like she always did.

 

"Hey you," Nick said, picking her up in a hug as he always did. He kissed her cheek before settling her back down in her seat.

 

"She in the guest room?" Nick asked, and started off in that direction before Schmidt could answer.

 

"Nick," Schmidt said, stopping him Winston and Sly are in there now, and I feel like you need to be more prepared. Whatever you think she looks like, you need to make it ten times worse

 

* * *

 

Jess couldn’t bring herself to move. She felt like a stranger in a familiar and once happy environment. She was numb, and with Cece not being here, she wasn't sure what to do next. She was hoping to have a shoulder to cry on.

 

The knock at the open door made her jump, and when she saw Winston and Aly there, she wasn't sure if she was happy to see them. She knew they would want her to file a report, but she wasn't sure she wanted to.

 

"Hey, Jess," Winston said, sitting in the bed next to her. "How are you feeling?" he asked, his tone soothing.

 

"Like I got ran over by a truck."

 

"Was the truck Mitch?" Aly asked.

 

"Look, I appreciate you guys coming, but I don’t think I want to file a report."

 

"Are you serious, Jess? The man has beaten you black and blue. Why the hell would you want to protect him?"

 

"Winston," Aly said, hushing him. She crouched down in front of Jess so that they were more even in height. "Look, I know that right now you are in shock, and you are afraid. But if you don’t report him now, there will be no evidence of the attack."

 

"I'm so ashamed," Jess whispered.

 

"You have nothing to be ashamed of. You are a victim, and you did whatever you had to do to survive. How about we make a deal? You tell us, or me, everything that happened. Let me take pictures of the bruises. But I swear I won't put it in the system until you give me the okay?"

 

Jess nodded, figuring it was a good compromise. She told them everything. Even things she wasn't sure she needed to say. But once she started, it was like a fountain, the words just fell out. She had just finished with the picture taking when she turned and saw Nick standing in the doorway.

 

She could see the anger flash in his eyes as he took in all the damage. She watched as he composed himself. He crossed the room quickly, and took her in his arms. The hug was a gentle one, showing her he was being mindful of her bruises.

Getting over the surprise of him showing up, she pushed away from him, and ran to the bathroom. Tears stung her tired eyes as she plopped on the bathroom floor. The shame she felt was too much, it made her stomach churn.

 

There was a tap on the door, followed by Nick's voice. "Jess? You don’t have to hide," he said, his voice low and gentle.

 

"Please go away," Jess replied. She hated that all she wanted to do was hold onto him, and never let go. She wanted the comfort he brought, but knew that if she gave in, she would be sucked on him again, and she had fought so hard to stop loving him.

 

"Jess." Nick's voice was closer to her, telling her that he had sat down. "Please. Let me in."

 

She let out a broken kind of sound. "I can't." She shook her head even though he couldn't see.

 

Nick's heart broke has Jess' voice broke. For the last three years he had so many conversations with her in is head, but not one featured her broken and bruised. He wanted to know why she left without saying goodbye. He wanted to know why she removed herself from his life. He wanted to tell her that he missed her and needed her. He wanted to tell her that things ended to badly with Reagan, and any relationship after that. More than anything, he wanted to tell her that she was the reason he couldn’t have a successful relationship. He was in love with her, and no amount of time was going to change that.

 

He had tried to talk to her before, but she wouldn’t have anything to do with him. He had only seen her a few times since she moved, and each time they only exchanged pleasant 'hellos,' a few 'how are yous,' and one 'I miss yous'— which came from him. She avoided him like the plague. So after a while, he stopped trying.

 

"Why? What did I do to make you hate me?" Nick rested his forehead on the door. "What did I do?" Silence. "Jess, let me in."

 

"I don’t want you to see me," Jess whispered barely loud enough for Nick to hear.

 

"Why not?"

 

"I'm so ashamed," Jess replied, her voice cracking on the last word. "How could I let this happen?"

 

Nick stood, anger overtaking the heartache. "Jessica Day, you open this damn door before I break it down!" he said, his voice stern. It pissed him off that she felt responsible.

 

He heard the door unlock, and opened slowly. She stood there, looking at the tile. Nick went to her, taking her into his arms. After a moment, Jess through her arms around him, and she let out a sob. "I'm so ashamed," she said the best she could.

 

Nick held her closer, moving his head to he could whisper in her ear. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. You did nothing wrong."

 

Jess said nothing as she cried in Nicks arms. God she needed this. She needed him. Because while the sight of him seemed to shatter any strength she had left, being in his arms held the pieces together.

 

"Please don’t go," she pleaded, hating how weak felt by pleading with him.

 

Nick lifted her into his arms, and brought her to the big chair in the corner of the room. She was so light, and thin it worried him. He sat, settling her in his lap. "I'm here for as long as you need me to be."

 

Jess let more tears fall because she could. Because she needed to, and because he agreed to stay.

* * *

 

 

Mitch walked into his empty house furious as fuck. He made his way to the living room and proceeded to throw things about in blind anger. The other lamp was throw against the wall. The centerpiece that Jess insisted they have crashed to the floor the coffee table was tipped over, and the sofa was kicked out of place. He kept going until he punched a picture and ended up with a piece of glass in his already bruised fist.

 

He backed up to a wall, then slid down it. He beat her. Straight up kicked the shit out of her. He laughed. It wasn't because he thought the situation was laughable, but because he enjoyed it. He enjoyed the fear in her eyes, and it was such a rush.

 

He looked over when his front door opened, followed by the beep, beep, beep of his alarm system acknowledged someone entering the house. It only took the intruder to find him.

 

"Shit, Mitch," Will said, looking at him with pity. "They hell is going on with you, man?"

 

Mitch laughed again. "Your pity is refreshing. Really it is," Mitch said, standing. "Just about as refreshing of the disapproval look you often give me."

 

"Where's Jess?" Will asked, seriously concerned for her. He felt sick when Mitch called him to inform him that he beat her. He knew Mitch had a record of being rough with the ladies, but this was too much.

 

"Why? You gonna save her? Does Beth know you got the hots for my girl?"

 

Will sighed impatiently. "This isn’t a fucking joke, Mitch. Please at least tell me she's alive."

 

"Yeah, she's alive," Mitch replied, then went to the kitchen. He needed a drink. "She left me, and by now she's with her friends."

 

"You gotta leave her be. Let her go."

 

Mitch banged his hand on the counter. "She's my wife!"

 

"How many have you had today?" Will asked. He didn’t have to clarify that he was talking about the alcohol.

 

"Fuck you, Will."

 

"You know," Will replied, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We've known each other since we were in diapers. Your my oldest, and once best friend. But your spiraling and I'm tired of pulling your ass out of trouble. You need to find yourself a new lawyer, because I'm done. And if you go near Jess again, I'll press charges."

 

"Fuck you!" Mitch yelled after Will.

 

Whatever, he didn't need that fake anyway. He wouldn’t know friendship if it hit him in the rear end! Whatever.

 

He went back to the bottle, and drank until he was stumbling. In a drunken state, he plotted ways he would get Jess back. Dead or alive. Nobody walks out on Mitch Colesen.

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	4. Chapter Four

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

...

**Three years ago**

"Is this seat taken?"

Jess looked up from her book, and felt a little speechless. The person who spoke was gorgeous, and his smile made her hear flutter. What had he said? Oh right. "Sure," she replied.

Jess marked the place in her book, before closing it and putting it on her lap. The table she sat at was small, and it already held her bagel and coffee, and she didn't want to be rude and place it in front of him.

"I'm Mitch," he said, holding out his hand for her to take.

"Jess," she replied, taking his hand. She shook it long enough to make it awkward, but he didn't seem to mind it. He chucked, and she let go. "Sorry," she said with a laugh.

"Oh no," Mitch replied. "It's quite alright." he paused. "Look, I'm not going to beat around the bush. I stopped in here two weeks ago because my usual place was closed, and I saw you at this exact table. I've come back every day since."

"Sounds a little stalkerish," Jess teased, making him laugh again. She loved the deep husky sound of it.

"Yes, well," Mitch replied with a shrug. "I was enchanted by you, and needed to work up the courage to ask you to dinner. Maybe Saturday night? Around six?"

Jess smiled at him. For a moment she almost declined his offer. She couldn't help think of Nick, and wished he was the one sitting across from her asking her on a date. But Nick was with Ragin, and he was clear about never getting back with her otherwise. And how could she really say no? Mitch was sexy and charming.

"You know what, I'd love to," She replied, hoping she hadn't paused too long.

"Great!" Mitch replied, relief clear on his face. "I need to be getting to work, but I'll see you Saturday. Six o clock." He hit her with another dashing smile before hurrying off. As he left, she realized that they hadn't exchanged any contact information.

* * *

 

When Jess woke, Nick was gone, but he was replaced by Cece. Jess said nothing as they watched each other.

"Hey," Cece said, breaking the silence.

The sob escaped Jess' throat, and there was no holding back. She cried as Cece pulled her close. "I'm so sorry," Jess managed.

"I know, and I forgive you," Cece replied as tears of her own fell. Jess was so messed up, and there was an anger in her she'd never felt before. She could Kill Mitch, and never feel sorry for it. "Shh. It's going to be okay."

Once she was cried out, Jess lay there silently, holding Cece's hand. She felt like she had so much to say. So much Cece needed to know, but she wasn't sure she could get it out. She wanted to tell Cece that she felt broken. That somehow a small part of her felt responsible for getting beat up. It was strange knowing that nothing she could ever do should be reason enough for a guy to hit her, let alone beat her, but also still feeling at fault. Maybe she should have tried harder to work things out?

Jess was about to say something when there was a knock on the door. It opened, and Nick poked his head in. "Dinner is ready, and you both need to eat."

Okay, so clearly what he meant to say was that Jess needed to eat, but she was glad he didn't single her out.

"I don't think I can," Jess told Cece, her throat dry from the lack of water, and all the crying she'd done. When was the last time she ate?

"You need to at least try," Cece replied, giving her a gentle smile. "For me?"

Jess smiled weakly in return. She nodded, and slowly sat up. She supposed after she ate, she should tell Winston and Aly to file the report.

They chatted like nothing was wrong. Nick, and Schmidt were going on about something silly, and Cece was busy cutting Lana's chicken. Jess knew they were trying to make her feel more at ease, and she was thankful for it. She didn't think she could stand it if they sat quietly exchanging worried glances. She much preferred this. Even if it felt just a little forced.

Once she ate all she could, which wasn't much, she excused herself from the table. She had about as much company as she could stand just now. Besides, she wanted a shower. She felt all of their stares as she walked away, but refused to linger on it.

In the shower she hissed a little as the hot water hit her skin. It felt nice on her aching muscles, but it stunk her cuts and burns. "You are mine!" she heard Mitch say, and she closed her eyes as she tried pushing his voice from her mind. But it didn't work. She kept hearing is voice filling her head with threats until she felt numb and was shivering.

"What are you doing?" Nick asked, as he reached his hand in, and turned the water off.

She looked up at him from the bottom of the tub as he moved the shower curtain out of the way. When had she sat down? She said nothing, because she wasn't sure exactly what she was doing. Actually, she wasn't even sure when the water went from hot to cold.

"Come on, let's get you out of there," Nick said, grabbing the towel, and holding out his hand to Jess.

* * *

 

Nick felt the now familiar flicker of anger as he looked at Jess. Now that she was naked, he could see just how much more bruising there was, and the burn makes. They looked like cigarette burns, but they were far too big. Cigar burns most likely. He felt a little sick to his stomach.

"Jess?" he inquired, because all she did was look at the hand he offered. She looked at him now, and her eyes were blank.

Nick bent down, and with a little effort, she had her out of the tub, and standing in the middle of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel. He used a dry wash cloth to carefully blot her dry. She took care not to hurt her, and apologized every time she winced.

"How could he do this to you?" Nick asked, once he was done. He thumbed away a tear that fell down her cheek. He hadn't even realized she had started to cry.

He put the clothe aside, and lead Jess to the bed. He helped her under the covers, and then laid next to her on top of them. He took her hand, because it was the only part of her that most likely didn't hurt, and he made small circles on the top of her hand with his thumb.

He watched her fall asleep, and made a silent vow that he would Make things right. He was going to make her right again. No matter what it took.

* * *

 

"What are we going to do?" Cece asked as she poured Nick and Schmidt some coffee.

"We certainly can't continue letting her lay in bed all day. It's been a week and she hardly eats," Schmidt replied.

"I'm not sure we can convince her to do otherwise." Nick sipped his coffee. "She needs time."

"She's scared. She thinks Mitch is going to retaliate," Cece said as she put the pot back in its place. "She might be right. He's dick enough to make a move."

"Let that mother fucker show his face," Nick threatened in a tone that made Cece and Schmidt exchange glances.

"Look, she's not going to get any better laying in that bed. Cece's right. We have to do something." Schmidt picked up his cup as he spoke. "We need to help her bounce back."

"What if she moves back into the loft?" Nick suggested making them both look at him. "Seriously, she can go back to familiar surroundings. Surroundings she made a life in. There might be some amount of comfort there."

Schmidt made a sound of agreement. "He might have a point."

"She'll never go for it," Cece replied giving Schmidt her, think about this look. Jess was doing her best not to love Nick anymore, and living with him wasn't something she would want to do. However, she thought to herself. Maybe being with Nick is what she needed. Nick and Reagan have been broken up for a year now, and while Jess still thought Nick didn't ever want to be with her again, Schmidt told her a while ago that Nick still loved Jess too.

"You know what? I think that a brilliant idea."

Schmidt and Nick looked at her in honest surprise. "Really?" They asked in unison.

"Yeah. Nick's right. Being in a familiar and once comfortable place might just work."

* * *

 

"What?" Jess asked as she sat up in the bed. "You want me to leave?" She assumed at some point she might overstay her welcome, but it hasn't been that long, has it?

"It's not that I want you to leave, sweetie. It's just not good for you to lay in this bed all day, and we think you might find a better routine in a more familiar environment."

"But Mitch will know to look for me there." Not to mention she would be living with Nick again and that wouldn't help her 'don't fall in love with Nick again' plan.

"He know to look for you here too. And I don't think he will come looking for you."

Jess sat there biting her bottom lip at she thought about things. She really liked the idea of moving back into the loft. She missed it terribly. And she might feel better there. Here she feels stuck in limbo. Like she can't seem to make herself do anything, but the loft might help bring back some normalcy. Or at least what used to be normal.

"How about you just give it a try? If you hate it, and want to come back you are more than welcome."

"Okay," Jess said with a nod. "I'll give it a try."

* * *

 

"Welcome home," Nick said, as he opened the door for Jess. He moved aside so she could walk in before him.

Jess looked around the loft, and while there were differences, things pretty much looked the same. The couch was new, but it was the same L shape the last one had been. This one however was made from cloth instead of leather. The TV was bigger, and the coffee table was newer too. But the décor, what little décor there was, was the same. The dining room was the same. The kitchen.

"Come on, I'll put your back in your room," Nick said, motioning for her to follow him.

She did as she was expected, but stopped at the open door. She wasn't sure what she had expected, but she was surprised. The walls were painted yellow. Not the dark ugly kind of yellow, but a bright almost baby yellow. Her bed was where it had been before, and it was dress in a blue and white floral print that would have totally something she would have bought when she was living here before. Where her desk on once been was a vanity type thing, and there was a dresser in the same spot there had been before. In the far corner of the room was one of the large round chairs that had a wooden base, and a large blue cushion almost the tame shade as the bed spread.

"What do you think?" Nick asked. He was a bit nervous that she wouldn't like it.

"It's…" She took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. She wasn't sure what to say. She did like it, but it made her sad because she didn't feel like she was the same Jess that would have loved this three years ago. It made her realize just how much she had changed.

"If you hate it we can do something else. I want be upset."

"No. I don't hate it." Jess walked into the room and ran her hand on the comforter. "Thank you. This was kind."

Nick smiled a little. "It's no big deal," he said, brushing it off in the way that he did. "Cece also picked up some clothes for you. Nothing much, but enough to get you by until you can get more."

"I'm sure they're great," she replied. She sat on the bed as Nick put her bag down in front of the vanity. It felt silly, and even a little stupid, but she forgot how kindness felt. Strange because she had thought Mitch was kind in the beginning, and she supposed in a way he was, but his kindness came at a cost. She just didn't see that until now.

Nick stood before her, looking unsure of what to do. She gave him the best smile she could because she didn't want him to worry about her. Also it was luckily late, so she could claim to be tired without getting to much worry over it. "I think I'm going to sleep."

"Okay," Nick replied looking worried anyway. "You know where I am if you need me. I'll cook breakfast in the morning."

His smile made her want to cry. God she missed him. "Sounds great."

* * *

 

Nick had fallen asleep on the couch. It was an uneasy sleep because he couldn't seem to stop thinking about Jess. Fact was, he hadn't thought much of anything else since he received Schmidt's call. He was almost settled and falling into a deeper sleep when Jess' screams pierced through him.

He was up and running to her room before his brain even had time to tell him to move. Jess was thrashing in the bed, but no longer screaming. "Jess," Nick said, sitting on the bed. "Jess," he had to say again. This time she gasped and opened her eyes.

"No!" she shouted, and pushed away from him.

"Shh, Jess it's me," Nick said gently.

"Nick?" Jess asked, clearly still trying to wake up fully.

"Yeah, it's me."

"Oh." Jess pulled the blanket closer to her chest. "I was…He was…"

"It's okay," Nick said, getting closer to her. He wrapped her in his arms, and pulled her to his chest. He was thrilled at she let him, and put her arms around him as well.

"I was so scared." she said, burying her face in his chest."

"I know," Nick replied, having to keep the anger out of his voice. Right now she didn't need the anger. "But you don't have to be afraid. I'm here now." He kissed the top of her head, and just rested his cheek there. Dos he missed this. Missed her. Missed being her man. But this was the time to change all that. He knew she was hurting now, and it might take a while, but he was going to prove to her that he was made for her. Because she was made for him.

...

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	5. Chapter Five

**Disclaimer: I don’t own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**   
  


 

  **Past**

 

"Bye!" Jess called to Mitch as she waved at him. The was their third date, and she was sure she was already in love. He treated her so sweetly, and made her feel so important.

 

He honked his horn as he pulled away, making her laugh. She walked into her apartment with a smile on her face. Jess hung her purse and key's on the hook by the door, and let out a sigh of relief as she took off her heels. Thank god she could finally take those things off! They were new, and her feet were killing her.

 

Walking into the kitchen she saw that she had a voice mail, and knew it was from Nick. He had been leaving her one every night, and every night she told herself that she wouldn't listen to it, but she couldn’t stop it. She missed his voice.

 

"Hey, Jess it's me." The messaged started. Jess pulled out a cup, and poured orange juice as she listened. "So I have to asked, did I do something wrong? I don't understand why you left, and I've been leaving you messages for weeks, and you still haven't responded. Schmidt said that he didn’t know anything, but I have a feeling he's lying to me. So what gives, Jess? Why won't you talk to me? My book is doing great. I wish you were here to talk about it with. I feel like I'm missing part of my routine, and Reagan keeps telling me that I will find a new routine, but you were one of the best part of my days. Please, Jess. Give me a call. Miss you."

 

The kitchen filled with silence, and for a moment, she almost called him. She missed him too, and he had always been the best part of her day too. Her thumb hovered over the call button, and she would have called, but her phone ran, and told her it was Mitch.

 

"Do you miss me?" he asked the moment she answered.

 

Jess laughed, the sadness she was just feeling dissipating. "I'm glad you called," she told him as she sat on the couch. "You home already?"

 

"Nearly, but I needed to hear that beautiful voice, and wanted to ask if you would go to Paris with me this weekend."

 

"What" Jess laughed. "Are you serious?" A weekend in Paris?

 

"As the plague," Mitch replied. "Come on, I have a meeting there Friday, and I thought it would be fun to show you my favorite places."

 

"You have a meeting in Paris?"

 

"We are an empire, Jess. Buying property is what we do, and we do it everywhere. So yes, Paris."

 

Jess smiled, even though she felt like he was annoyed a bit by her question. "I would love to go to Paris with you."

 

"Fantastic! I will pick you up on Friday, and Jess, wear that dress I got you."

 

Jess' brows furrowed. "You haven't bought me a dress."

 

"You'll see," Mitch said, then hung up.

 

Jess puzzled over that a moment, but let it go. The next morning she found a big box on her little front porch. Inside was a simple light pink wrap dress, but it was made from material that felt like butter. It was a little bit different from her usual choice, but she wanted to please him, and it was a sweet thing for him to do.

* * *

 

**Now**

 

"Hey," Nick said as Jess joined him in the kitchen. "You okay?" She looked uncomfortable.

 

"That smells great," Jess replied, referring to the eggs and bacon.

 

Nick could tell she was deflecting, but he went with it. "Yeah, I was going to put them on some toast."

 

"Mmm. I miss your egg and bacon toast," she said, giving him what he assumed was supposed to pass as a smile. It was the closest thing he had seen since she'd been back, so he would take it.

 

Once everything was done, he brought both plates to the table. He watched her as she ate slowly. She was thinner now than she was a week ago, and that worried him, but at least she was starting to eat again. "I have to go to the bar early today. You want to come? I could use help with the books. If I get done early, we could come home and watch a movie or something."

 

Jess chewed slowly, and he knew she was thinking things over. He could see it in her eyes. "I don’t think I can." she replied after a minute.

 

"Okay," Nick replied. They ate silently for a while. "How about I take the day off? We can get you new clothes? Or go to the farmers market. I heard that the craft fair is in town too."

 

"I don't know," Jess replied. She chewed her bottom lip. Her eyes looked grave and she started to tear up. It was funny that now that she was no longer with Mitch, she could see how much control he had over her life.

 

"We can stay here instead. We can order in, whatever you want, and play board games or something."

 

"You'd miss work for me?" Mitch never took a day off work just for her. At least not after they got married. He told her his work was more important. It had hurt that he felt that way, but he smooth if over by telling her that once he got the promotion he was hoping for, then he could spend more time on what he wanted to be most important and that was her.

 

Nick let out a little laugh that hid the tingle of the now familiar anger he felt. "Of course. Your worth missing work for. Besides, my boss is kinda cool, and understands." It did pay to be your own boss.

 

Jess chuckled. She actually chucked. "Be sure to thank him for me."

 

Nick smiled. "I will."

 

Her smile vanished, and that look came back. "It's been a long time since I decided what I wanted to eat," she said, gravely. She looked past him with blank eyes. "I hadn’t realized until now."

 

Nick had to fight back his own emotions. They would do her now good just now. "You make your own choices now. And I will only put my opinion in if asked."

 

She looked up at him. "I had my whole life planned." she said, allowing tears to fall. "I lived a lie, but I had my whole life planned. I was happy. We were going to have kids. I was going to live a long blessed life. Mitch was supposed to be my happily ever after."

 

"I know," Nick took her hand from across the table. "But he was an illusion. "You will find everything you dreamed of with the right guy, and Mitch will be only a bad memory. You will have children, I promise you will. And your husband will love and cherish you." His voice broke a little, because he wanted to be that guy, but he was afraid. He hated to admit that while he planned on winning her heart back, he was afraid that if he admitted his feelings, it would push her further away.

 

Jess stood as she wiped at tears. "I think I'm going to take a shower," she said, hurrying off to the bathroom.

 

Nick let her go, and as he clean up the breakfast mess, he thought about what they should do about Mitch. They needed to get Jess to file for divorce, but that wasn't going to happen for a while. Mitch was going to pay, and he selfishly hoped Mitch would try to see Jess. This way he could make him pay, but that wouldn’t help her, and he needed to put her first. He would put her first.

* * *

 

 

Jess felt better after her shower. She hated this. Hated the fog she couldn't seem to lift. The heaviness her heart felt. The way Mitch poked at her in her dreams. The way her skin pricked every time she thought she hear a noise. Anything that suggested Mitch might have caught up to her.

 

But she had to admit coming here was a good idea. She felt save. But being around nick was strange. Not because he made her uncomfortable. Him being here made her feel safe. Nick wasn't someone you would assume could protect you, but she'd seen him be viscous when he needed to be. She's seen him punch people out before. No it was strange because he was still him. Even after all these years he was still him, and she was no longer her. Him being who he was made her realize how much she changed. How much Mitch had changed her.

 

It was like all the little things he did were now coming in load in clear. All the shit she ignored was now haunting her. She ignored the signs because she wanted the fairy tale. She wanted to have her cake and eat it too.

 

As she towel dried her hair, she looked around the bathroom. Her eyes rested on the shelf that had one been hers. On it was a bag of pads, and a box of tampons. She blink. And blinked again. Her heart dropped into her stomach, and panic overtook her. No. No. No.

 

What day was it? She couldn’t remember. She'd been living in a haze, and she felt like she had been that way forever.

 

"What day is it?" She asked Nick. She was wrapped in a towel, but still dripping water.

 

"What?" Nick asked. He looked at her, and she was frantic. Scared. "You okay?"

 

"What day is it!" she yelled, her voice cracking.

 

"Um Wednesday."

 

"The date, Nick!"

 

"The twentieth." He gave her an odd look. "What's happening?"

 

"I..I…" she shook her head and ran for her room.

 

No. This wasn't happening. This wasn't real. No! She dressed half crazed. Her heart ached in her chest, and she felt like she was going to be sick. This wasn't happening. This. Wasn't. Happening.

 

"Jess? What's going on?" Nick asked outside her door.

 

Once dressed she opened the door, and pushed past a baffled Nick. "Jess?" he called after her.

 

She ignored him. She couldn’t speak. The lump in her throat was already suffocating her.

 

Before she could get on the elevator, Nick grabbed her arm. To her embarrassment, she winced, and jerked away from him. The fear overtook her for just a moment. He threw is hands up, showing her that he wasn't going to hurt her. The doors opened then, and she got on. She was happy that Nick seemed to be in too much shock to follow after her.

* * *

 

 

Nick paced the living room floor as he ran his hands down is face in frustration. Where was she? Why did she leave? He checked the time. Thirty minutes. She'd been gone for thirty minutes. "Ugh!" he exclaimed. He couldn’t do this. Couldn't do nothing. He grabbed his keys, and left. He would give himself twenty minutes to find her, then he was calling in reinforcements.

* * *

 

Jess returned to an empty loft. She figured he was out looking for her, but she couldn’t worry about that now. She went to the bathroom, and thanked god that she had to pee. She watched closed her eyes until the timer went off announcing that it had been three minutes. With a deep breath, she opened them.

 

She dropped the test and started to sob. "No," she cried out. It was a painful no.

 

After she managed to get her sobs under control she pulled out her phone. She called Sadie and tearfully told her that she needed to be seen. She had to be sure. It could be a false positive. Right?

* * *

 

"Jess!" Nick called out. He walked through the house because the homeless man outside told him she had come back.

 

He checked her room. The spare room, then the bathroom. He was about to leave when something caught his eye. He went to the sink and picked up the plastic. It only took a second to realize what it was, and a second more to see the second line that indicated it was positive.

 

He stood there in shock. She's pregnant. The fucker got her pregnant. Holy shit.

He called Cece to let her know that he knew where Jess was, and they didn't need to hurry out of Lana's appointment.

 

But bit should he do now? He assumed Jess went to see Sadie, so at least he didn't have to worry to much about her. At least she was out of the loft.

 

Okay, so that didn't make him feel better. He tried to busy himself with working on one of his books, but his head was too full. Jess was pregnant. How was she going to cope? How could he help her?

 

He wasn't going to let her do this on her own. That he knew for sure. She would have his full support. And everyone else's. Bit what about Mitch? Would he not have claim to the baby?

 

Fuck Mitch, nick though as he got back up. Once again he grabbed his jacket, and headed for the door. He was going to show Jess that she wasn't going to be alone. That he wasn't going anywhere.

* * *

 

Once he returned to the loft he set things up quickly. He had congratulation balloons that he tied to the table. On the table was diapers and some baby clothes, both for boys and girls. Out of a bassinet thingy and got a few stiffed animals. While at the baby store he realized he didn't know a whole lot about babies, but he would learn. He even got the pacifier things and bottles, though he wasn't sure if Jess wanted to breath feed.

 

He had just finished taking the green and white giraffe car seat out of the box, and put it on the chair when the loft door open. Nick kicked the box under the table before facing her

 

She looked speechless as she approached the table. Her mouth hung slightly open. "what's all this?" she asked, picking up pair of baby booties.

 

Because he said nothing she turned to him, and he heard her gasp.

 

He was down on one knee, holding up a ring. It was the one he had bought years ago when he thought they would always be together. He aight it on a whim because he knew that if he ever proposed that was the ring he wanted to do it with. He felt nervous as she looked at him with round, surprised eyes.

 

"Jessica Day. From the moment you first walked into this loft I knew I loved you. And everyday after, I fell deeper and deeper until I was happily drowning in the love I felt for you. The first time I kissed you, my heart sang with joy, and the moment we called things off, I felt a sorrow that has never left. I have never stopped loving you, and I wish I had the balls to have said it already by time ago. This isn't the future I wanted with you, but it's one I gladly accept. I love you, and I don't want you to go through this alone. Together we can be a family, and I will spend everyday proving to you that I can be the man you and the baby boy need. Please make me the happiest man in the universe. Will you marry me?"

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	6. Chapter Six

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

 

 

Speechless. She was speechless. It moved her that Nick would do this for her. Marry her just because he didn't want her to do it alone. And his speech was beautiful. It was perfect in fact, but she wasn't sure she could believe him. It was odd to feel like he wouldn't lie, and yet still be so unsure. If he loved her why had he never said anything before? Back at that book store he said they'd never work. That ship had sailed. Besides, she had thought Mitch loved her, and look where that got her.

"Now is a good time to say something," Nick said, still down on one knee, and starting to feel foolish.

"Um, I'm not pregnant." she said, and the look of confusion on his face was almost laughable.

"You're not?" he asked, rising. A mixture of emotions settled over him. On one hand he was relieved. Jess having to have a constant reminder of Mitch wouldn't have been easy on her. But he was also getting used to the idea of raising a child. Sure, he'd always wanted to have a kid someday, but that day was approaching sooner then he thought.

She shook her head. "No. It was a false positive." Jess rubbed her left arm and shrugged.

"You don't seem happy about that."

"I'm thrilled, actually. I wasn't sure what I was feeling before. The idea of having his baby. It was something I once wanted, but I felt sick over it. And when she told me I wasn't, I felt a weight lifted off me." She paused. "This was sweet, Nick. I really appreciate the gesture."

"I'm still asking," Nick said, giving her a small smile. He knew the no was coming, but he would be okay with that. He wasn't giving up. One day, he was sure she would say yes.

Okay, so that made her heart flutter, and the sickness she had just been feeling turned to butterflies. But she couldn't she wasn't ready. "I can't, Nick. I can't fall in love with you again."

"Why? Am I that bad of a choice?"

"I don't feel whole. I know that at some point this feeling will go away, and someday this mess might be far behind me, but I'm not sure I can ever be the Jess you once loved. I just…" She shook her head. "I'm broken, Nick. You deserve better than me."

"I'll wait," Nick said simply, getting a puzzled look from Jess. "I'll wait for you to feel less broken. I'll wait for you to feel like you can feel safe enough not to look over your shoulder. I'll be here to help you feel whole again, and I'll be here loving the Jess you are, not the one you think you used to be. I'll be here, and I'll wait."

Jess swallowed hard. She didn't know how to respond to that. She wanted to throw her arms around him and tell him that he made her feel safe. But she kept her distance. She cleared her throat. "You still up for that movie?"

"Yeah," he replied, motioning toward the living room. "I'll order some pizza too."

"Great," she replied. She took a glance at the baby stuff and thanked god she wasn't pregnant.

* * *

 

"He proposed!" Cece asked, her tone surprised.

Cece and Jess sat in Jess' bed, backs up against the headboard, legs covered. They were sharing a bowl of popcorn, and Jess nodded at her response. "It was really sweet. Swoon worthy, really."

"And you said no why?"

"Because I'm…" Jess sighed. She had thought about this all night. Nick said he loved her. Said he had known that he loved her from day one. He said them spitting up was the worst thing to happen to him, but how did she know he meant it? How did she know it wasn't just the heat of the moment? Nick being the good guy he is?

"Jess, he loves you." Cece said, knowing exactly what was on Jess' mind. "Maybe he asked now because he thought you were pregnant, but he would have done it anyway."

"How can you be sure? I mean, he made it clear that we would never be together. Remember? That's the whole reason I left in the first place."

"I know because that's why he and Reagan broke up. She confided in me that she was feeling overshadowed by you, and that said something considering you weren't even around. I told her to ask Nick about it. Well, she did and he said that he was pining for you." Cece let that linger.

"He was?" Jess asked, genuinely surprised. "Why? I'm nothing to pin over. I can't even." Jess stopped talking. Since when was she a self-doubter? "I don't know."

"Oh Jess." Cece shook her head. "You are the best, most loving, and caring person I know. You are my best friend and the god mother to my child. You're smart and passionate, and beautiful. Your worthy of love, and you deserve any man you want. And Nick is pretty great himself."

Jess chewed her lip. A habit she had picked up at some point over the years. "I don't know how to start again. I feel lost, and scared. I don't know."

Cece took Jess' hand. "You will figure it out."

There was a few minutes of silence while they ate some popcorn. "I'm going to be getting divorced," Jess said glumly.

"You are," Cece replied. She have Jess' hand a squeeze.

"I'm scared, Cece. I've been waiting for him to do something. Anything and I think maybe he thinks I'll still go back, and if I send him divorce papers it might stir the pot."

"You are not in this alone. We all have your back."

A knock on the door interrupted them. Winston pocked his head in, and smiled. "Hey, we are all here and ready to eat."

"Okay, we will be out in a moment," Cece replied.

"Thank you," Jess said, as they got off the bed.

"Anytime, babe," Cece replied, and followed Jess from the room.

* * *

 

Mitch slammed his hand on the table, and was pissed when the lawyer didn't so much as flinch. "She's my goddamn wife!"

Mr. McManus slowly rose. "And she has every right to leave Mr. Coleson. Now I'd advise you leave the premises or I'll have you removed."

Mitch snarled as he left the fancy office. Fuck him, he didn't need legal help anyway. He would take care of this on his own.

Outside it was raining, but he took his sweet time getting to his car. He was almost there when he saw Will. His already dark mood darkened.

"Mitch," will said, inclining his head to him.

"You and your law mates are useless!" Mitch barked in return.

"I see, Will replied. "Stand down, Mitch. Let the woman go."

Mitch stormed away and Will watched as Mitch sped off in his car. As Will walked into his office he decided he needed to get ahold of Jess. Mitch was a lose cannon.

* * *

 

"That outfit is outrageous," Mitch said, standing crossed arms by the bed. Jess looked at him in the mirror and said nothin as she finished applying her lip stick. "I will not let you leave the house like that."

Jess looked at her outfit. He wore a green skirt with a sleeveless floral print top. She loved her outfit, and planned on paring it with flats. "You can't tell me what I can and cannot wear," Jess replied stubbornly.

She walked by him, but he grabbed her arm. She gasped as he dig his nails in. "You have no control over your life. Not anymore. You gave that to me when you married me. You silly girl." Mitch laughed.

"Let go of me!"

Mitch raised his and and struck her.

Jess woke with a start. Her heart pounded in her chest. She got out of bed, because she needed to be on her feet. She couldn't have the disadvantage of laying down if Mitch showed. But she was tired. So damn tired.

She wasn't sure how long she stood there, but she knew she couldn't stay there all night. Tomorrow she planned on going to the court house and file for divorce. She felt like it was important to get enough sleep for that.

Okay, so she felt ridicules as she crossed the hall to Nick's room, and even dumber as he hand hovered an inch away from the door in knocking position.

Do something! She urged herself. Either knock on the damn door or go back to your own room.

"You okay?" Nick asked, making Jess scream. And it wasn't a little one. It was loud and full of fear. She jumped away from him, and the moment she realized it was him, some of the fear in her eyes lessened.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Nick said, going to her. He hugged her, and was glad she let him. "You okay?"

Jess nodded and after she felt she could speak she said, "I know this is silly, but was was hoping it would be okay to sleep with you." She paused and because she realized that he could take that wrong she quickly clarified. "I mean sleep in you bed with you, not sleep with you."

"Yeah, I don't mind," Nick said, opening the door and motioning her in.

The both stood a little awkwardly, then Nick got in. Once he was settled he watched Jess and he could see she was debating. " I don't bit,Jess."

She nodded, and she knew that Nick would never hurt her, but the last time she spent the night in bed with a man it was Mitch. Yeah, Nick had laid with her when she was at Cece's but she had been so out of it. God this was stupid.

Before she chickened out she got into the bed. She faced away from him, but after a few minutes she turned toward him. He was watching her, and the look in his eyes took her breath away. Had Mitch ever looked at her like that?

"You okay?" Nick asked, his voice low.

"I'm working on it," she replied.

They lay quietly, and Jess hated that her heart raced and she felt like she couldn't breath. She knew she was having a panic attack, and that only made her feel worse. She was about to jump out of the bed with the fear that settled in her stomach, but Nick's arms engulfed her, pulling her to him.

"It's okay. You're going to be okay. Just breath." He kissed her forehead, and rubbed her back. "He's not her. I am, and I got you."

She clung to him in return, and the familiar smell of him calmed her some. And the way she fit against him. The familiar way the fit together had her heart slowing, and as he spoke to her softly, careingly, she drifted away in sleep.

 

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm so sorry about the long wait. Usually I don't allow going more than a couple days without an update, but my life boomed with things that have kept me unable to write. I'm going to be busy for a while, but I want to assure my readers that I have not lost interest in this story, and it will continue until complete. I already have most the story written in my brain, so there's no way I will abandon it. Thank you all for following and reviewing. Enjoy :)

 

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

 

Jess felt sick as she hung up the phone with Will. She was still in Nick's bed, thought he wasn't, and was a little annoyed at the early morning phone call. Though now she was glad she answered.

After a moment of sitting in fear, she got up and started the hunt for Nick. She found him sitting at the dining table, looking at some sort of paperwork. He looked focus, and for the first time since she'd been back she realized that he'd changed some too. He seemed more grown up.

She sat next to him, stealing the cup of coffee and taking a sip. She wanted to moan. Mitch had insisted she only drink black coffee. She couldn't even identify the moment she switched over. Was it slowly? Or did she just quit creamer and sugar cold turkey? "It's six in the morning. What are you doing up?"

Nick laughed, and snagged his coffee back. He drank some before giving it back to Jess. Book stuff. I'm trying come up with a realistic character. Guess it bothered me." He shrugged, and flashed her a smile.

"Mitch is off his rocker." She said it so out of the blue, she could all but hear his brain switching gears.

"What do you mean?"

"His friend, Will called me. Said I should have my guard up. He was at his office, Will his a lawyer, yelling and carrying on out how I'm his wife and he'd get me back on way or the other." She sipped the coffee, trying not to show the fear she was feeling.

Nick knew she was afraid, however, and took her free hand. "He can't touch you here."

Jess smiled just a little. "I know. I trust you."

It meant a lot, Nick thought to himself. "Good."

….

"Do you think he will show up?" Cece put a wiggling Lana at the kitchen table and gave her some kind of special toddler food.

"I don't know. I hope not." Jess shrugged. "But I think as long as I'm alone I'll be okay." Or that is what she told herself anyway. She was terrified t leave the apartment.

"You should have filed charges. I don't understand why you wouldn't."

"Because I just want him in the past. Besides, he would have gotten out on bail and would have been super pissed." She stood, went to the fridge. She wasn't looking for anything, but she needed to move. Needed something to do."

"We have your back. You know that."

"I have your back too!" Lana piped up.

"Well now I feel much better!" Jess went to her and gave her an enthusiastic smile. "Thank you, sweetheart." Jess kissed Lana's cheek as Lana giggled.

"Hey, I was thinking maybe we could hit the market before you two had to leave. I want to make Nick a nice dinner. A sort of thank you. You know?"

Cece smiled as she leaned back against the counter. "Sure, I need to get a few things anyway. How's it going with him?"

"Good. We still get alone. He's changed. Not much, and he's still the same Nick he's always been, but he's matured." Jess laughed. "I never thought he'd mature more than he had already."

"He's been through a lot that required some growth. The book tour. Owning the bar. Having to pay all the bills here himself. Losing you, then Reagan. Buying the loft was a big step too. He said he wanted to feel like he was putting down thicker roots." Cece laughed a little at this. "But yeah, he's grown up a bit."

Jess contemplated this a bit. Cece was right. Those events could and did change a person. And while she didn't want to, she felt her wall starting to come down. She was starting to feel just a little more like herself. In fact, when she dressed for the market she planned on putting on the sunflower skirt and a bright yellow shirt Nick had bought her the other day because he saw her eyeing it. She was eyeing it, but felt conflicted about buying it. Mitch was still in her head, and that was starting to piss her off.

"Lana!" Cece gave Lana an accusing look. "You know better than to stuff your mouth."

Jess watched Cece tend to Lana and she swore her ovaries ached. She wanted that. And she knew she was running out of time. She realized now that she looked past all the small jabs Mitch gave her. Made herself believe she was madly in love because she wanted children, and he was more than willing to accommodate her.

"If we are going, we should get to it."

"Okay." Jess nodded. "I just need to change real quick. Only be a minute."

….

He watched her from afar. He kept enough distance so she wouldn't see him, and kept his cap down. She was a small market with her Indian friend and a child who he assumed was the friends.

Mitch grabbed a magazine, to further hid himself. He watched as the girls ogled over a tiny shirt. Jess put the shirt in the cart, making the child happy. She received a hug from the tiny human, and it pissed him off that she looked so happy. She shouldn't be happy with anyone but him. He pulled out his canteen and took a mouthful.

He had turned toward the hot dogs when Jess tuned down the main isle. He chanced a glance at her cart and he knew she was making baked Ziti. He hated that dish, and it felt like a smack in the face that she was making it now. He never allowed her to make that crap. Though he suspected she did all kinds of things when she was away with her parents.

And that outfit. He hated that she went back to wearing shit like that. She had appropriate clothes to wear at home, and he would see to it that she burned that fucking skirt. Ugh.

"I felt so stupid. I mean, I was too scared to sleep alone after the dream so I spent the night with Nick."

SHE WHAT! Mitch turned red with the anger, and if it wasn't for everyone in the store, he'd pop her in the face right then and there. And wait until he got his hands on Nick. He'd always known she was a slut. She couldn't ever be faithful to him. How many guys had the bitch actually been with? How naïve was he to believe that she never spread her legs for anyone but him? Yeah he was a stupid mother fuck.

He followed them as they finished their shopping, and was about to follow them out to make his move, but a bunch of screaming kids got in his way. They all wore matching blue shirts, and were too busy looking over the snacks to care that they got in his way.

"Children you're in this man's way," A frazzled looking woman said, smiling at him sweetly. "I'm so sorry. You know kids, they just don't thing. She shepherd the kids out of his way, and they moved so slow he almost considered much the little asshats out of the way.

By the time he got outside Jess had gotten away. He was so pissed her nearly screamed. He would get his whore of a wife back. Sooner or later.

…..

Nick was grumpy by the time he got home from the publisher. He has about two hours before he needed to be at the bar and he planned on grabbing pop tarts on his way to his room so he could use that time sleeping. He seemed to be in a slump with coming up with a mother book, and his publisher and fans were anxious for something new.

He opened the loft door to a familiar and wonderful smell. His stomach lurched with hunger, but he was smiling by the time he made it to the kitchen. "Baked Ziti. One of my favorites."

Jess turned from the oven with the dish in her hands. She placed it on the pot holder. "I know. That's why I made it. It's been years since I've had it." She blushed a little because of the way Nick looked at her. It also stirred up those butterflies. "What?"

"I love you," he replied and nearly laughed because she looked shocked. "Why is it that every time I say that, you look like you want to jump out of your skin?"

"Just stop saying it. Okay? It hurts." Not to mention it was currently making her wonder the last time Mitch had said the words to her?

The smile on his face vanished and he could see that the haunted look was back in her eyes. "We still going down to the courthouse tomorrow?" Nick asked.

Jess took a deep breath and nodded. She was terrified, but she had to do it. She needed to do it. "You want to get plates?" She changed the subject, as she brought the Ziti to the table. Tonight was supposed to be a thank to Nick. Not what she planned on doing next.

"So I made this to say thank you. For everything." She smiled as he poured her drink.

"You're welcome. Always." Nick lifted his class. "To friends who are there when the other is in need."

She raised her own glass. "Amen to that."

For a while they ate in silence. Jess found it hard to swallow due to the fact that Mitch was on her mind. She felt sick as she thought about the last few painful months she'd spent with him. And the beatings. God how would she ever get over that?

Nick watched her as he ate. She was thinking of him. He could tell whenever he was on her mind. Her eyes would darken, and she absently touch the healing burn on her neck. It had been weeks since she'd been home, and those marks were still healing. It had been hard to watch the bruising fade, but at least those were gone. These burns would scar, marking her forever. A constant reminder of that motherfucker.

"What?" Jess asked, noting that he was watching her. She blushed, and he loved it. Loved that it brought life to her cheeks even if it was only for a moment.

"Nothing. Just lost in thought." He looked away from her, but didn't miss that she most pushed her food around her plate. She was barely eating enough to survive and it worried him. She slept a lot too. He hated the dark circles under her eyes and the way her cheeks sunk in just a little. He knew from the night she slept with him, cuddled close that her ribs were sticking out way more the they used too.

He had to do something, but he didn't know what. She was stuck in her head. She was in constant fear that Mitch would show up, and while he told her Mitch would never lay a hand on her again, she was still afraid. And sad. Even if she couldn't admit it to herself, she still loved the asshole. And she was angry at herself for allowing that. For not seeing the abusive behavior.

"I feel like you're x-raying me," Jess mumbled, hiding her eyes from him.

"I like your outfit," He said, changing the subject. "It's more you than what you were wearing before. Bold has always looked good on you."

She looked at him now, her eyes wide in shock a moment before she tried shrugging it off. "It was there."

Nick said nothing more because he had a brilliant idea. It would take up a huge chunk of his savings, but it would get Jess not only out of LA, but hopefully out of her head. A vacation from life, and he could use one too. He would have to take a day or two to nail out the details, and have someone cover him at the bar. Schmidt could manage the books for a week or so.

Nick left for his shift at the bar, his head full of plans for the trip. He wanted to take her somewhere tropical. He stepped off the elevator, and apologized to the person he bumped into. He walked out of the building, lost in pleasant thoughts.

Nick was half way to his car when his heart dropped. The person looked familiar and he was sure he knew why. He raced back into the building, and took the stairs two at a time. He burst into the loft, managing to startle Jess and she dropped the plates. They clattered to the floor, breaking.

"What the hell, Nick?" Jess had her hands to her heart as it pounded like it was trying to escape her chest.

Nick said nothing as he walked around the loft, looking to be sure they were alone. He could feel her eyes on him, and he wasn't sure what to say. There was no need to frighten her.

"What is it?" Jess felt uneasy as Nick walked over to her.

"I can't seem to find my other shoes," he lied as he bend down to pick up the broken plates.

Jess knelt down to help him, and she knew he was lying. Of course he was. But she didn't push the issue. "Aren't you going to be late?"

Nick shook his head. "I forgot Eric was on tonight. I got mixed up."

She eyed him suspiciously. She could tell he was on edge about something, but he wasn't going to tell her why, and dwelling on it made her feel panicky.

Thirty minutes later the entire gang and children where in the loft, and they were playing Yahtzee. Jess did her best not to read too much into this, but she felt like he had purposefully fill the loft with everyone. Had he seen Mitch? Or was he just worried?

"Yahtzee!" Schmidt called out.

Winston rolled his eyes. "Man, you have all the luck."

Aly called out Yahtzee too, and she looked over at Winston, battering her eyelashes at him. "Better luck next time, honey."

"I have time to catch up," Winston insisted.

"You would have to get three Yahtzee's in a row," Cece informed him with a laugh.

Jess forgot her worry, and had to smile at their banter. This was nice. This right here was like old times.

….

Mitch cursed as he walked away from the building. He was hiding in the stairway when Nick had come bounding up the steps. Luckily, mitch had went up another flight when he heard the rushed sound of someone running up the stairs. He planned on waiting for Nick to leave, but the others arrived, and Mitch had no choice but to believe that Nick had realized he was there. Why the hell did they have to bump into each other?

Mitch found the closest bar, and settled in. He needed a plan. Anything that got Jess alone would do. He snatched up the whiskey the moment it was placed in from of him, and drank it down.

 

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	8. Chapter Eight

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

...

Jess walked into the living room with a yawn. She walked passed the suitcases on her way to the kitchen, but stopped when her brain registered them. "You going somewhere?"

Nick smiled at her from the table. "We are. I have some time off and I book a trip for the two of us."

"Why?" Jess poured herself some coffee. She could figure as to what the reason was, but she wanted to ask anyway.

"Because," Nick said, as he walked passed her, kissing her cheek as he did so. "We both could use some time away. Where we'll be going, you won't have to look over your shoulder."

"Do you think that running away from my problems is the best approach? I mean, he's not going away."

"No. And this isn't about running away. This is about giving you the time to heal some. Do you think you could face him in court?"

Jess felt a little sick as she paled. She didn't answer the question, but she knew she didn't need to. She looked at the suitcases and felt a little uneasy. The last time she traveled it was with Mitch, and that hadn't gone well. She wanted to kick herself for not seeing the signs. "Okay."

Nick smiled at her as she spoke. "We going to do this?"

"Yeah," Jess replied with as much enthusiasm as she could. "Yeah let's do this!" Okay, so it was a little sarcastic, but it got the job done.

* * *

 

**Past**

Jess smiled as she waved down Mitch. She liked that he looked so professional. He waved back, beckoning her to him. She went to him, and loved how he pulled her close. "Guy. This is my beautiful Jessica. Jessica, the guys. James, Hank, Frances, and Will."

They hall greeted her, after exchanging glances with each other. Jess found that a bit odd, but was quickly distracted buy Mitch pulling her away. He guided her around the room, Introducing her to all his colleges.

After they made their rounds, Mitch lead her out on the balcony. "What are you doing here?" he asked, annoyance in his tone.

Jess was confused at this. "You invited me. Remember?"

She had a moment of unease as a few emotions flashed on his face before he was smiling again. "Yes, but you said you couldn't make it. A school thing, remember?"

"Yeah, but I got out early. You seemed upset that I couldn't come."

Mitch thinned his lips has he inhaled sharply. Clearly he was angry. "I'm sorry, have I don't something wrong?"

Mitch let out a laugh, and this confused her further. "You are a prize Jessica Day." Mitch Held her to his chest in a hug. Over her head he eyed the woman who was supposed to go home with him later. He caught her eye, and with a slight shake of his head, she nodded and disappeared.

He kissed the top of her head. "It's just a small hiccup in plans. I was going to go out with the guys after, but worry not. I'd rather take you out for Ice cream later."

The rest of the night went well after that. Jess decided she liked some of his "friends" but disliked others. Will seemed nice, and something about the way he watched Mitch and her made her wonder if he was jealous of Mitch. She didn't like Hank at all. He was vulgar and way to handsy for her taste.

After the party Mitch did in fact take her out for Ice cream, and as they walked the black and a half back to his place, she felt happy. Content. She loved this man, and she hoped he was the one. The one who would finally give her all she wanted and hoped for.

The next morning she stood in the mirror checking out the pant suit he bought and insisted she wore that day. She really didn't like it, but it pleased him, so she figured that this one time she would wear the thing.

Mitch walked up behind her, wrapping her in a huge. "You looked gorgeous," he said with a smile. They watched each other in the mirror a moment before he added, "You would look even better if you let your bangs grow out."

Jess laughed and swatted at him. She would never let that happen. She loved her bangs, and would feel strange not having them. Little did she know, she would take that statement to heart and never again did she cut them.

* * *

 

**Now**

After the long plane ride, and the two and a half hour car ride, Jess learned that they would be taking an hour boat ride to the remote little island that Nick was taking her to. Apparently the owner of the island only visited it once a year, and decided to rent it out to others while he was away. The island was big enough to have three separate locations, and each house and location was designated for whoever rented that area.

"You're going to love it. The sun will set on our section of the island, and if no one is currently renting the east side we are allowed to watch it rise if we want. And our Cabin it has large double doors that face the beach that we can open. And there's staff there so we have already prepared food. We don't have to cook if we don't want too."

Nick stopped talking and just watched her. She was looking at the sun that was already starting its descend toward the horizon. The wind blew her dark hair all around, and his heart fluttered. She was so damn gorgeous and hoped that one day she would feel that again. That one day she will remember how amazing she is and how smart. And that she won't jump at every unexpected noise or always look over her shoulder.

The wind blew her hair up and exposed her neck. He saw the burn mark there and felt sick with anger. He quickly composed himself because she looked over at him as she fixed her hair so it covered the burn. She smiled at him sweetly before turning back to the sun.

Nick went to her then, and smiled when he saw her eyes were closed, and there was the slightest of smiles playing at her lips. For the first time it seemed that she might actually feel safe.

"Tell me what you are thinking?" his said, feeling a little silly at the words, but didn't much care.

"I'm thinking that you are a smart man Nick Miller."

Nick laughed at that, but said nothing else. For the rest of the ride he stood there with her, and it pleased him that her shoulders were relaxed, and her eyes remained closed.

They were helped into what looked like a mix between a cabin and bungalow, and after the staff made sure that they were settled, they were left to themselves.

"I'm exhausted." Jess announced has she fell back on the enormous bed. The bed was soft and seemed to engulf her. The bed was made up in blue bedding that was like butter to the touch, and Jess laid there, stroking the floral fabric.

"Come one, lets unpack, then we can have dinner on the back deck." Nick took lead, putting his things away.

It only took minutes for them to unpack, and as Nick has suggested they took their dinner on the back deck, which was lit up by string lights, and a fire pit that was close enough to feel it's warmth, but far enough away to not be too warmed by it.

Dinner was accompanied by small talk and memories of the old days. Back when life seemed simpler, and everyone lived in the loft. It seemed sad that they all moved away except Nick, but they both agreed it was also good. And they were all still there a lot anyway.

Later that night Jess went into the large bathroom to change, and found a pink sticky note on the mirror. It read: You are kind. You are beautiful. You are smart. Nick. As she teared a little, as she put the note in the drawer and finished getting dressed.

Because Nick packed most of her bags, and she was still short on clothes, she was happy to find that he packed her a couple pajama sets. With Mitch she didn't wear them because he hated them. She shook him from her thoughts as she put her used clothes in the hamper, and made her way back to the bedroom.

She had expected to see Nick, but he wasn't in the room. She hunted him down and found him on the welcoming looking couch that was large enough to fit the whole gang. "You going to sleep out here?" she asked, as she plopped down. She did her best to sound nonchalant.

"I figured you would want the bed," Nick responded. He would love nothing more than to share the bed with her, but he wanted the ball in her court. He wanted to give her as much or as little space as she wanted.

"I do." she settled back into the couch pillows. "But the bed is big enough for both of us." She said this, looking down at her hands.

Nick leaned over, putting his hand in hers. "Then we will share the bed. You ready to sleep?"

Jess nodded, and followed Nick to the room. She wasn't kidding when she said the bed was big enough to share. It was so big that they could have made a boundary with pillows between them and still have enough room.

* * *

 

_"I hate when you wear your hair like that," Mitch complained. "You look much prettier when it's up."_

_"I want to wear it down today. Besides, it's too cold to wear it up."_

_"Then wear a scarf," Mitch replied, throwing one at her._

_Jess started to put it on, but stopped. "No, I'm going to wear my hair down."_

_Mitch grabbed her, throwing her against the wall, his hand finding her throat. "I don't think you heard me!" his bit out. "You will wear your hair up, and you will wear that scarf."_

_"What makes you think I will listen to you!" she snapped out. She sounded braver then she felt. She was in fact scared out of her mind, and she was surprised she spoke that way to him._

_"I told you to let your bangs grow out and you did, didn't you?" he squeezed a little, and she fought for air. Tears started streaming down her face._

_"Jess," Mitch said, but it was off. The voice that came out wasn't his but Nick's. "Jess," Nick said again, but this time it echoed as if it came out of the walls._

Jess jerked awake, and grasped Nicks arm. He was propped up on his arm, the other holding onto her. "It's okay. You were only dreaming. I've got you."

Jess nodded, but was gasping for air as the tears fell. She could feel Mitch's hands around her throat, and it made her sick to her stomach. "I can't. I can't get him out of me. Out of my mind. Out of my skin!" She started to rub at her arms as if trying to wipe him away. She could feel the anxiety making her irrational, but could stop the hysteria. "He's in my skin!" she cried, starting to scratch at herself now.

"No," Nick said, grabbing her wrist tight so she couldn't pull away.

"I can't stand his hands on me! I can't stand his breath on my skin!" She tried pulling away, but Nick wouldn't let her. He was afraid she would scratch herself raw. Her arms were already red from where she started scratching.

"Listen to me!" Nick said with authority. The tone seemed to momentarily get her attention. "He is not here. He is not in your skin. You will never feel his hands on you, and you will never feel his breath on you again. Do you hear me?"

"My mind." She shook her head frantically. "I can't get him out of my mind!" she said with a sob.

Nick took her face in his hands, "He won't be there forever. As time goes on he will fade. As new memories are made, the ones with him will fade. And until they do, I will be here. I will help you through the nights." He thumbed away the tears. "He won't be in your mind forever. I promise."

Jess nodded and tried to compose herself. She could feel the fear that was so overwhelming moments ago ease. She grabbed his wrist and looked into his soft and caring eyes. "I want me back. I want to be who I was when I was with you."

Nick placed a kiss on her forehead. "Then let's spend our time here finding you."

Jess moved quickly, hugging him and burying her face in his chest. She breathed in the scent of his soap, and felt herself relax some. Mitch liked to use strong soap and cologne, and while he smelt amazing, she had missed the simple smell of a clean man. Nick in particular. He always smelt like Irish spring soap and in this moment it grounded her.

"Come on," Nick said after holding her a while. He laid back down, pulling her down with him so that she was wrapped in his arms. "I'll hold you all night so you have no more had dreams." She snuggled into him, and he kissed the top of her head.

After a while her body relaxed, and she felt like she could actually fall asleep.

"Night, Nick."

"Goodnight, Sweetie."

...

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	9. Chapter Nine

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

…

"I don't understand why no one has arrested him yet," Cece said, as she put cream cheese on Lana's bagel. They were all having breakfast at a bakery Winston insisted they all try.

"Because Jess only filed a report. She's not pressing charges. At least not yet." Winston replied, but kept his eyes on Aly. He was worried that she was in labor, but didn't seem to think so herself.

"Would you stop looking at me? I'm fine. The baby is due next week, and everything is right on schedule."

"But you said you had a contraction."

"Oh that's normal," Schmidt said, patting Winston on the back. "It's nothing to worry over unless they get worse and happen closer together.

Cece laughed. "He seems calm now, but when it happened to me he paid my OBGYN to make a house visit in the middle of the night. And that was after the doctor tried to assure him everything was fine."

"Quiet woman!" Schmidt said playfully, then leaned over and gave her cheek a kiss. "I was a nervous wreck this close to the due date."

"Well I'm fine. And as far as arresting Mitch goes, I will gladly do it myself the moment Jess decides to press charges." Aly shifted, making Winston alert again. She laughed as she batted his hands away. "I'm just getting comfortable."

…..

Mitch watched them over his menu. His was furious and ridiculously hung over. He had fumed as he watched the dick faced Nick put a bunch of bags in a cab, and both him and Jessica take off to god knows where. He had tried to follow them, but once they hit the highway where was no way to know which cab was theirs.

He had assumed they went to the airport, but he had no luck there either. So know he was reduced to watching her dumb friends laugh about dumb shit and talk about what an asshole he is. Well, he would show them. The moment Jessica was back he was going to get her, and they would never see her again. If he couldn't have her, no one could!

 

* * *

 

Jess laughed as Nick helped her over a large rock. According to the map they were headed toward cliff that jutted out into the ocean, and they decided that it would be a good place for lunch. The cook prepared them a nice lunch and packed it in a wooden basket, and Claire pointed them in the right direction for their destination.

It was more of a hike than either of them had prepared for, but the hike was welcomed. There wasn't much spoken between them, but as they helped each other over the unfamiliar terrain, laughing and holding hands most of the time, they seemed to be connecting. A connection on a level the neither of them could explain. It was like all this time there had been an unspoken unease that was now being replace with laughter and ease.

Finally they found themselves on the cliff and the view was amazing. In one direction you could see the ocean go on for miles. On the other you could see the cabin. Claire had told them to take a change of clothes so that if they wanted to jump from the cliff they could. But both insisted that they wouldn't be doing that.

Jess laid out the blanket, then Nick helped her pull out all the food. After it was all out, both got down to business with the eating. They ate in silence, something they both were getting used to.

"I'm sorry," Jess said out of the blue. They were packing everything back in the basket, but he stopped the moment she spoke.

"For?"

Jess sat crisscrossed, and looked down at her hands. "That I left without saying goodbye…I was hurting, and I heard what you said at the book signing and you said that we would never happen. I'm not proud of how I left. And I'm sorry"

"You left because of what I said? How long did you listen to that speech? Because I also said that I'm the one who blew it."

Jess looked at him now. "I didn't hear that part. But you were with Reagan and that was killing me because I still loved you and I knew I couldn't live under the same roof with you anymore. I needed to move on, and for me that meant cutting you out of my life. I'm so sorry for that."

Nick nodded. It was nice to finally understand why she left. It had never made sense until now. "It's in the past now. You have nothing to be sorry for."

Jess nodded, but still felt sad for how she handled the situation. It all seemed childish and silly now.

"Hey Jess?" Nick said, after a minute of awkward silence.

"Yeah?"

"Will you cloud gaze with me?"

Jess laughed and agreed. They laid so that their head where side by side, but their bodies were face opposite directions. They spent the afternoon like this. Just lying on the cliff watching the clouds and pointing out shapes when they found them. It was made even better when Jess took his hand and kept it.

 

* * *

 

Nick stood by Jess as she looked out over the ocean. It was starting to get darker, and he wanted to get them back to the house. "Tell me what you're thinking."

"The Jess before Mitch would jump." She looked over at him. "The Jess with him wouldn't."

"And the Jess standing here today?"

Jess shook her head. "Is realizing how much of herself she lost." She walked over to the basket and grabbed it. "We should head back."

They walked in silence until they reached the beach. "It happened so gradually, that didn't ever see it. Looking back I can see everything clearly. But never did I see it while it was happening. At least until the end anyway."

"What matters now is your out, and you're okay," Nick replied. It was a dumb reply, but he wasn't really sure how to respond.

"Am I though? Okay I mean?" She shook her head as she climbed up the steps to the cabin. "My body has healed," She continued as they entered the kitchen. "But my mind is still back there with him. I feel like he can reach me no matter where I go."

"Then we will work on getting him out of your head."

Jess looked at him. She was smiling, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Come on," Nick said, dragging her to the living room. He went over to the radio and turned it on. A fast paced song was on and he started dancing to it. Nick couldn't really dance, so he made it up as he went, and this made her laugh. Before they knew it, both were dancing and laughing.

Nick was delighted to hear her laugh. Actually laugh. It was a noise he'd missed more than he knew, and he vowed to always make her laugh.

They were interrupted by Claire who wanted to be sure there was nothing they needed, as well as take orders for dinner. Nick walked her away from Jess, who plopped breathlessly on the couch, to discuss dinner without Jess' listening ears.

He returned with a smile. "Tonight we eat on the beach."

 

* * *

 

"This is beautiful!" Jess said, as they sat at the table that was set up for them. The table was lit with candles, and a simple centerpiece of three yellow flowers. And the backdrop was even more beautiful. The table was set up on the beach, the breeze was warm and soft, and the light from the moon seemed to dance in the water.

"Not as beautiful as you," Nick replied, as he poured her wine.

Jess laughed. "That was a little cheesy."

Nick joined in. "Yes, it was." He could feel the blush hit his cheeks, but didn't care. "But it's true."

They were silent for a while. Not the uncomfortable kind, but the kind that you could only have with people you knew beyond measure. It was comfortable, and a relief to not have to fill the silence with useless chatter. They ate, and the silence wasn't broken until they were making their way back to the cabin.

"How about we make tomorrow a beach day?" Jess suggested.

Nick smiled at her. "Yeah, sounds good to me."

Jess nodded, and when she slipped her hand into his, she saw that crooked smile he got when he was happy about something, but didn't want to make a thing out of it.

After they took turns taking showers, they cuddled in front of the TV on the big couch and watch a rom com movie. Jess laid her head on Nick while they watch, and it really did feel like home. It sucked that when they left here, and went back to reality, things would have to go back to normal. She couldn't fall in love again. Ever. Never will she allow herself to be vulnerable. And yet, she knew that she was already in love with Nick. And she knew that sooner or later, she wouldn't be able to deny it. But she was still going to try.

Sometime later, Jess felt herself being carried to the bed. She tried to wake up enough to protest, but she couldn't seem to find the strength. "I can walk," she slurred.

"I know," Nick replied, but still carried her to the bed. He laid her down, and tucked her in.

"Stay."

Nick smiled, and got in next to her. He pulled her to his chest, and closed his eyes. "Always."

 

* * *

 

Jess woke again to an empty bed. She rolled out slowly, and stumbled into the bathroom. There was yet another sticky note on the mirror. _Good morning, beautiful. There is something waiting for you on the desk_. Jess did her business, then proceeded to the desk. She found another note sitting on a journal. _The old Jess used to write. I don't know if the Jess who was with HIM did. But the real question is, does the Jess you are today?_

Jess smiled. She couldn't help it. She wrote in the beginning. When she first got with Mitch she would write in her journal every night. But after she learned that Mitch read them, she felt violated and stopped. She looked over her shoulder when she heard Nicks voice. She could tell he was on the phone with someone by his tone.

He wouldn't read her journal. He never had. She used to leave it on his night stand, and never did she worry about it. Even when she left it on the bed, and would pass by the room, and sometime she would catch him moving it. A few times she wondered if he had read it, but anytime she gave him the opportunity, he would only move it from one place to another. Never opening it.

"Morning," Nick said, as he walked in. "Breakfast is on the table."

After they ate, the both got dressed for their day at the beach, But Jess found herself standing in front of the full length mirror, feeling sick. She was still a little too thin. And while most of the burses had faded, the one on her thigh was still making her skin and ugly color. And the burns from the cigar stood out from her pale skin like angry red eyes. And some of the deeper cuts were clearly going to scar. She was second guessing her choice of bathing suit. She wanted to wear the two piece, but the one piece might hide more of her body. Maybe she would put on a T-shirt and shorts instead.

She felt ugly. What would Nick think when he saw her scarred body? She touched the burn on her neck, and felt the tears burn at her eyes. She felt marked. Forever scared by her past. A warning to all others that she was once Mitch's wife.

She hadn't hear Nick walk in, but she met his eyes in the mirror as he approached. He hugged her from behind, and she sagged against him.

….

When he saw her looking at herself in that mirror, he could only imagine what she was thinking. The haunted look in her eyes broke his heart, and when she started to cry, he couldn't stay away. He went to her, and was relieved when she allowed him to hug her.

"You are beautiful ." He placed a kiss on the burn on her neck. "So very beautiful." He placed a kiss on the cut on her shoulder.

"My scars are ugly. I hate them"

"They a beautiful." Nick touch the two on the side of her breast before falling to his knees. "They are a blessing, because you survived." He proceeded to kiss the burns on her hip and stomach. He looked up at her, right into her eyes. "My god you're beautiful."

Jess put her hands to her face as the blush hit her cheeks. Nick stood. "Don't hid from me." He took her hands in his. "You never have to hid from me."

Jess shook her head. "I'm broken, Nick. And these scars…"

"Are a part of the love of my life. And I will tell you this every day. I will remind you that you are beautiful, and so are your scars. I will tell you every day the you are not broken. And if you ever feel that you are, then I will be the glue that holds you together."

"I don't know if I will ever be ready to be with another man. I'm so afraid of losing myself."

"I will be whatever you need me to be. We don't have to be anything more than friends."

Jess nodded, and tried on a smile. "Come on. Let's get to the beach." She made sure not to catch her reflection in the mirror, otherwise she might lose her gumption to wear the bathing suit.

Throughout the day, she would glance at Nick to see if he was staring at her scars. But she only ever caught him looking at her face. And god the way he looked at her made her body feel flushed. She didn't linger in it thought. She wasn't ready for that. She wasn't sure she would ever be ready for that.

She felt like a kid as they played in the ocean, splashing water at each other, and building sandcastles. They had a picnic under a large umbrella—Sandwiches, watermelon and apple juice. It truly added to the carefree day.

As the sun set, they made their way back to the cabin, smelling like the ocean, and ready to retire for the day.

Jess babbled on about the time she was lost in a small town in Germany. He laughed with her as she told him about a man who pretended not to speak English and ended up taking her to dinner. It was during dinner that he revealed that he could speak English, but he wanted to wine and dine her before taking her back to the hotel she was staying at.

It was a great date, and she got to try food she never would have tried before. What she didn't mention was how pissed Mitch was at her for not only getting lost, but letting her phone die.

"That's one hell of an adventure." Nick stepped aside, holding the door open for her.

"It was."

Dinner was cooked by them that night. Claire brought them the ingredients they needed, and the recipe. It was messy, but fun, and while they messed up a little, it was edible, and the perfect end to their day.

…..

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	10. Chapter Ten

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

…..

**Past**

Her outfit was laid out for her on the bed, and the hair dresser had put her hair up in some curly up-do that she figured would take at least an hour to undo. Her makeup was also done a professional, and while she wouldn't usually wear makeup this fancy and overdone, she had to admit it looked good.

Her dress was also super fancy. It was deep red, the same shade her lips where. It was a strapless dress with a sweetheart neckline. The skirt pat of the dress was a mermaid style, and she already knew she would hate trying to walk in it. Not that she would dare wear anything else. Mitch was so picky about these things.

After she was in the dress, and no, she couldn't really breath thank you, she looked in the mirror. The dress had a diamond belt that hugged her waist, and that wasn't the only diamonds she was wearing. The diamond necklace on her neck was heavy as it draped down her chest and back. Her shoes had diamonds as well, and yes, she was sure they were real as well.

"Where is he taking me? To an audience with the queen?" Jess said to Cece who was on the tablet. They were face timing for the first time in forever.

"Maybe. You look hot, babe."

"I feel like a princess. And also a little ridiculous." She tugged at her dress, but there was no moving it. The dress was so snug she was sure they would have to cut her out of it.

"Don't. You look great!" Cece smiled. "I hate to cut this short, but I need to get dinner started. Lana needs to eat or she will have a meltdown. I swear she has the worst case of 'hangry' ever.

They both laughed as they exchanged goodbyes. Just as Jess hit the end button, Mitch showed up. He too was done up in fancy clothes. "Aren't you looking fancy?"

"You looked ready to meet the queen yourself." Mitch Kissed her deep. "You are going to look great on my arm tonight."

Jess smiled. "So, where are we going?"

"To dinner. In the Eiffel Tower."

"Wait, seriously?"

Mitch laughed now. "Yes, seriously. Come, we have a bit of a way to go."

…

It was beautiful. Looking down on Paris at night was the most breathtaking sight she'd ever seen. And dinner was fantastic. As she stood there overlooking Paris, she hadn't noticed that Mitch knelt down. He cleared his throat, causing her to look over, then down. She gasped, covering her mouth.

"Jessica Day, you are a prize. You make me happy, and bring joy and a little bit of funk into my life. Would you do the honor of becoming my wife?"

Jess cried as she nodded, and they embraced. "Yes. I will!" she said happily. She pulled away, looking at the ring. It was huge, and a bit goddy, but for him she would wear it. For him she would do anything.

…

**Now**

"Are you serious?" Jess asked, looking down the side of the mountain. There were ropes that were meant for people to climb down so they could sit behind the water fall. Jess couldn't believe that Nick was actually wanting to do this.

"I'm down if you are."

"We could fall."

Nick nodded. "We could."

Jess looked back down. Her heart pounded in her chest, but she didn't care. She wanted to do it. Even if she was scared. "Okay. Let's do this!"

The climb down was scary, and there were a few moments that Jess asked herself what the hell she was thinking. And the one time Nick slipped a little scared her so much, she thought she was going to be sick. But this was so worth it. The little cave behind the waterfall was surreal. She felt transported from earth to a whole other planet.

"Tell me what you're thinking," Nick said.

Jess looked at him. He was still soaked, and currently shirtless. His hair fell a little into his face, and his beard was longer than usual, but she loved the way he looked just now. Maybe it was the surreal feeling of being somewhere else, but she felt like she could tell her secrets and fears here and she would be safe from them forever.

"I was just thinking how amazing this is." She looked down at her hands. "How amazing you are."

Nick did that half smile he did. "You're making me blush," he teased.

"I listened to every voicemail you left me." Jess looked at him now. Surprise was clear on his face. "Every single one you left. I should have responded, but I was hurting, and then I fell in love with Mitch…" Jess trailed off for a moment. "He got really mad one time when you left a voicemail. You found out that I was getting married and you asked if I was sure if it's what I wanted."

"I remember," Nick replied softly. The idea of her marrying someone else made his heart ache, and he never liked Mitch. He'd only ever met him once, but it was enough.

"I listened to the voicemail over a dozen times. Mitch heard it and he took my phone, and threw it against the wall. We got into aa really big fight over it." she laughed. "I can't believe I ignored the signs. They were there. All along, and I just over looked them."

"You loved him. Love is bli…."

"I loved what he represented," Jess cut in. She stood now, pacing in the little space. "He represented marriage and a family. Stability and companionship." She shook her head. "I thought I loved him, but looking back now, I feel like I loved what he represented. And I wanted that so bad I allowed myself to overlook the bad. I was so stupid."

"You're not stupid, Jess."

I am!" She spun toward him. "I am stupid because if I would have been honest with myself. Honest about why I…" Jess let out a frustrated sigh. "I don't think I ever loved him, and I don't think I ever got over you."

Nick sat there saying nothing. Yes, his heart leapt with joy, yet it broke at the same time. If both of them had just been honest with each other, then none of this might not have happened. "I never got over you either."

Jess sat now, burying her face in her hands. She was grateful that Nick didn't attempt to comfort her, because she didn't think she could handle that. She felt like a wet piece of paper. If someone tried to pick her up, she would fall apart.

After a while She put on a brave face and stood. "Come one, lets get beck. I could use a shower."

Nick followed behind her the entire way back. He watch the way she moved and couldn't help but smile to himself. She was as she had always been. Every curve of her was forever engraved in his mind. Very freckle. Every scar. She was forever engraved in is mind.

Even this Jess who was a far cry from the on he had fallen in love with was perfect to him. He wished he could make her see herself though his eyes. She would finally understand that his love for her is forever.

She stepped on a large rock, pausing to look back at him. She smiled at him, but her eyes were haunted. She waited until he caught up before continuing on.

Nick took her hand now, and was glad she took his has well. They made it back to the beach and as Nick looked out into the ocean and decided that the needed to go to the other side of the island and watch the sun rise.

Once back at the cabin, Jess excused herself so she could shower, and Nick settled down at the desk in the living room. He opened his laptop to the book he started writing the night after they arrived here. It was about a woman who's life was turned upside down and the man who was there to pick her back up again. Yes, Jess was is inspiration, and no he wouldn't publish it without her permission.

After about thirty minutes he realized she still hadn't come out of the room, and while he hated to think she ever would, he suddenly got anxious that she might have harmed herself.

Trying not to allow fear to get the best of him, he walked quickly to the room, relieved to find her sleeping, wrapped in the towel, on the bed. He watched her for a minute, unable to stop his smile. She looked peaceful in sleep, and it was nice to see. Even if the moment she woke back up, that haunted look would return to her eyes.

Nick returned to the laptop, and opened another page. He let all the anger and sadness seep out on him and into words. Words that played out the scenario that had gone round and round his head a thousand times over. One that would no doubt put Nick behind bars.

….

"I won't do it!" Jess insisted as she tries take off the ridiculous pant suite Mitch was trying to force her to wear. She hates them, and she couldn't believe she even put the damn thing on.

"You will do as I say!" Mitch laughed as he lounged on the bed. He shifted the pillows, making them neat and tidy like always. All the pillows always had to sit just right on the bed. It was an impulsive thing for him.

"Not anymore I won't!" Jess spun around, looking right at her closet. She rushed over to the closet, pulling scissors out and tried cutting the outfit off, but somehow, the fabric broke the scissors. "What the hell?"

Mitch laughed again. The deep sound she grew used to taking on a more evil tone. "Face it Jessica, you can't fight me. You will never win."

"Don't call me that!" Jess snapped. I hate when people call me Jessica and I hate the way you way it even more!" With that, Jess went to the door, but it wouldn't open.

"You can't go anywhere without asking first."

"Leave me alone! I don't belong to you!" She tried pulling at the pant suit again.

"You don't belong to me! Then why can't you seem to move on? Why am I still in your head? You haven't changed your hair either. You might have gotten away physically, but your mom in every other way!"

"No!" Jess called out. She jerked awake, and before she could give anything much thought she was out of the bed, and running out of the cabin. She ignored Nick as he called after her. She knew by his tone that he was confused and worried, but she couldn't stop. She had to do this.

She ran right to the path that lead up to the cliff Nick had taken her. She tricked a couple time, slipped on a few of the large rocks, and her ankle screamed in protest due to the fact the she twisted it. Still she pushed on. She had to do this. She just had too.

….

"Jess!" Nick called after her frantically. She left the cabin like it was on fire, and startled the shit out of him. He wished she would stop and tell him what the hell was going on.

He cleared the trees the lead to the cliff just in time to hear her scream, "I belong to me!" Before jumping off the cliff.

Nick knew people jumped off this cliff all the time, but that didn't stop his heart from dropping into his stomach. He ran to the edge, and waited the heartbeats that felt like eternity before he saw Jess' head break the surface of the water.

She started swimming to the beach. After a moment of relief, Nick jumped in after her, and the fall was terrifying, but not as bad as he thought it would be.

He started for the shore, but by the time he reached it, Jess had already made it, and was at the cabin. He wondered if she had some kind of super swim skill because she swam way fast.

Once inside the cabin, he ran for the bedroom and found her in front of the full length mirror. Water dripping from her clothes, and scissors in her hand. Nick saw the hair on the floor before looking at her reflection in the mirror. She cut her bangs and when her eyes met his she said slowly, "This is me."

…..

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

.................................

Nick took a deep breath as she put down the scissors. She stood there, her wet clothes dripping on the floor, her newly cut bangs crooked. Not that now was the time to mention that. Her once frantic eyes were now sure and determined

"This is me," She repeated, her tone final. It was like a switch went off and she had a confidence she didn't have the night before.

"Yes," Nick replied, a small smile on his lips. "Why don't we get you out of those clothes? You'll freeze to death."

Surprisingly, Jess started undressing right there, and the frantic look returned to her eyes. "Let's do it, Nick. Have sex with me. Right here and now."

Nick stood there, taking her in. God she was beautiful, and he wanted more than anything to take her up on her offer, but whatever this was, she wasn't in the right state of mind. Her switch in mood said that well enough. "Jess…"

"No," she hushed him as she went to him. She took his hand, placing on her breast. "I'm ready."

Nick took it away, and the look on her face made him want to cry for her. The pain and confusion was tangible. "We can't."

"Yes we can. I'm ready, Nick. Please." There was a pause as she started to cry. "Please! Please, Nick. I'm Ready. I'm ready to be the new me. Please!" Jess fell to the floor in a sob. "Please," she whispered.

Nick grabbed the sheet from the bed, and wrapped it around her. "Honey, I would love to have sex with you. You have no idea how much self-control it's taking to not to. I want to, but not now. Not like this."

"I know." Jess sobbed. "I'm such a mess. I'm sorry,"

"It's fine. We are fine." Nick helped her off the floor. "You should take a bath, get warm."

Jess agreed and headed for the bathroom. She paused and looked back at him. "Thank you."

* * *

 

Later that night, Jess woke in the bed alone. She laid there a while, but it was clear that she wasn't going to be able to fall back asleep. Not to mention she was curious as to what Nick was doing up a two in the morning.

She found him in the living room, with his laptop balanced on a pillow in front of him. He was definitely lost in whatever it was he was doing.

"Hey."

Nick looked up as Jess sat down on the couch in front of him. She looked better then she had when she fell asleep. "Hey."

"Whatcha doing?"

"Writing. I have a story I couldn't shake."

Jess smiled. "What's is about?"

Nick hesitated, but decided to tell her. "A woman who lost herself in an abusive relationship, and was fighting to find her way once she got away from him."

Jess sat there silently as she took him what he was saying. She wasn't sure how to feel about it, but she was okay with it. Maybe not something she wants out in the world. Not that anyone would know it's her.

"How does it end?" Maybe Nick knew how to fix her.

"I don't know. I haven't got there yet. I know that this is personal to you. But I promise I will not publish it without your permission."

"Okay," Jess settled back on the couch and gave Nick the best smile she could. "Do you think I'll be normal again?"

Nick let out a soft chuckle. "I hope not." He went on as Jess looked at him confused. "Because normal isn't you. You're spunky, and out there. You dance to your own beat. You're like a snowflake, Jess. Beautiful and one of a kind."

Jess blushed as she looked down at her hands. This was why she loved Nick. He said these things, and unlike Mitch, he meant them. Nick ever asked her to be anyone but herself. He loved her for her. And she loved him for that.

* * *

 

Mitch stood in Jess' room, and he could feel the anger boil his blood. How long were they going to stay gone? And what the fuck where they doing? He looked down at the phone in his hand when it went off for the tenth time. He knew it was is ass hat lawyer telling him that going to court was his only option. He still couldn't believe she had the audacity to file for divorce.

But the joke was on her. Bitch won't get away that easily! Now that he was in the loft, he would stay here and wait for her to get home. The whore will get hers.

Mitch looked over at the bed, and shook his head. It was an ugly bedspread, and she never could put the pillows right. He fixed them out of impulse before sitting in the chair that sat in the corner of the room. This whole room screamed of the Jessica he hated. The one who was all kinds of weird.

He had changed her. Molded her to fit the image he had of the perfect wife. A woman who did what he said, when he said. Wore what he wanted her to wear. A wife to be at his beck and call. She was his, and he will make them both suffer.

Yes, he thought with a smile. He would make them suffer. He would torture Nick in front of Jessica. Yes, and then he will make sure Jessica knows just how dumb she was thinking she could leave him. He will make her beg him to take her back. Oh yes, she will beg!

* * *

 

"Jess," Nick said, waking her up. She woke with a start, but quickly realized it was him. "Come on, get dressed."

"What? Where are we going?" She looked out the double doors that lead outside. "It's still dark out."

"I know. But not for long. Come on!" He smiled as he urged her out of bed.

Jess dressed quickly and giggled as Nick rushed her out the door. He walked quickly, taking her down a path they hadn't been on before. She smiled when he took her hand, their fingers linking together. It was a simple thing, but his hand in hers felt right. Those hands that would never hurt her. Those hands that would never raise up to strike her across the cheek. Those hands that would never find themselves on her body when she didn't want them too.

She said nothing as they walked on for a long while. Finally they came to anther beach and she understood. They were on the other side of the island. "Wont we get in trouble?"

"No. The couple who was here left yesterday, and the new people won't be here until tomorrow." Nick led down a bit, before sitting on the towel that was laid out.

Jess watched the sun rise, and it was beautiful. Beautiful like the man she leaned into. Her head resting on his shoulder. After a while she closed her eyes, and let the warmth of the sun settle into her skin and the warmth of Nick settle into her heart.

* * *

 

Two days later Jess stood in front of the glass doors watching the rain. The storm that raged outdoors mirrored the storm within her. It almost made her laugh that she could compare her emotions to a raging storm. Yet the couple days she felt oddly at peace. There were moments of doubt and fear, but she now knew that she would be okay. Because now when she looked in the mirror she saw Jess. She wore what she wanted. Did her hair the way she wanted. Made her own choices. She was herself again. And that was something she would never give up again.

"It's pouring out there."

Jess looked over at Nick as he walked in. "Yeah it is."

Nick want to her, kissing her cheek. "You doing okay?"

"Actually, I am. I really am." Jess hugged Nick, then reached up, Kissing him gently. "I really am." She said against his lips.

After a moment of hesitation, Nick kissed her back. God he missed this. The way she felt in his arms. The way her lips pressed to his. The smell of her perfume.

"Nick?"

"Yes, Jess?"

"Make love to me."

Her blue eyes were calm and sure when he looked into them. Now. Now she was ready. He kissed her harder now, this kiss urgent and seeking. He was so ready for this. Ready for her.

They lost themselves in each other. Ever touch, ever kiss. Ever emotion colliding with sensation. Nick took his time with her. Touching and exploring her. Kissing her, and loving the sounds that escaped her lips as he pleasured her. Jess loving the way Nick touch her. Kissed her. He knew her body better than anyone. He knew how to touch. How to please. He brought her over the edge time and again, and when he finally entered her, their bodying moving together in perfect rhythm, Jess cried. Not because there was something wrong, but because everything was so right.

* * *

 

"It's so strange being home." Jess said, as they got back to the loft. She went to the kitchen, and started some tea.

"It does feel weird. The island felt like a different world" Nick agreed. He put the keys in a bowl on the table behind the couch. He looked at it a moment because something about the table seemed off, but dismissed it. "I'm going to have to go to the store."

"Yeah, Jess replied as she pulled out the now spoiled milk out of the fridge, and tossed it in the trash.

She opened the cabinet to pull down a cup, and her skin crawled. All the handles of the cups were facing the same way. she messed them up before closing the door. She would have to learn not to do that anymore. She hated it.

"Do you want anything?" Nick asked, He wanted to go now to get it over with. Once he was settled, he wouldn't want to go out again tonight.

"No I think I'm good. Just be quick."

He laid a quick kiss on her lips. "I love you Jessica Day."

Jess couldn't help but smile. "I love you too Nicolas Miller."

Jess brought her bag into her room, putting it in front of the closet. She turned, and stopped. Her blood going cold before her brain could even comprehend why she was scared. She knew for a fact that she didn't arrange her pillows like that, and that could only mean one thing. She shook as she text Nick, We need APRICOTS!

She felt him behind her, and before she could move, she felt his hands sliding over her mouth at the exact moment the tea pot let out its piercing scream, making up for her muffled one.

 

........................

I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl or any of its characters. All rights belong to the creators of the show.**

**.....................**

"You've cut your bangs," Mitch said, drawing the words out. He smiled with satisfaction as Jess shook in the chair he tied her to. "Oh, Jessica. You stupid, stupid girl."

Jess wanted to cry, but she vowed to herself Mitch would never see her cry again, and she was going to keep that vow. Looking at him now, she didn't understand what she saw in him. His eyes were cruel, and his smile fake. God she was so desperate for someone to take Nick off her mind, she allowed herself to believe she was in love with this man. Looking back, she should never had left. Ever.

"What? Nothing to say to your husband?" He wanted to hit her. To see those pale cheeks pink with his hand, but waiting was better. Nick needed to see this.

"You are not my husband. Not anymore." Was that her? She sounded way more confident then she felt.

Mitches nostrils flared. It took everything in him not to strike her. But he managed to keep his anger under ropes. "I would watch that mouth of yours. You don't want to make things worse, do you?" He bent over, licking the side of her face. Marking his territory.

…..

Jess jerked her head away from him. What the hell was wrong with him? She wanted to make a snarky comeback, but he was right. This situation was bad. There was no reason to make it worse. She needed to distract him. Keep him from doing anything bad until she could think of how to stop him. She really hoped that Nick got and understood her message.

"You're right." Mitch looked at her with a quizzical expression. "I was stupid. And I feel so guilty about everything I've put you through. Let's stop all this madness. Let go home."

Mitch laughed. "You've already put in divorce papers. There is no going back."

"I can take them back. We don't have to go through with it. Don't you want me? Don't you want to make babies, and have everything we've talked about?"

Mitch looked at her with a crazy expression. If she had to guess, she would say that he was trying to decide if he should trust her or not. "No. You just want to trick me. We've been here before, remember?"

"No. I want to go home. I miss you. You're my happiness. Remember? My soulmate." Jess felt sick at saying the words to him, but they were necessary, and hopefully pulling him back from the edge.

Mitch dropped to his knees in front of her. He looked at her a moment before leaning in for a kiss. Jess felt herself tense, and so did he. He jumped up, the anger back in his eyes. I'll make you regret ever falling out of love with me!"

…

Nick was real quiet about opening the front door. His heart pounded so hard it made him shake. Or maybe that was fear and adrenalin. He went to the closet first, pulling out the bat. He looked around as he did so, concluding that they must be in one of the rooms. Most likely Jess'.

His phone buzzed quietly in his pocket, making him panic. What if Mitch heard it? He pulled it out, turning the damn thing off. Surprise was the objective.

Nick walked silently to the room, and prayed that Mitch was facing away from the door.

"I'm not afraid of you," he heard Jess say.

"Really now? That either makes you really dumb or…No, that just makes you dumb. Do you have any Idea what I could do to you? Your boy toy will be gone for at least twenty minutes. I could do a lot of damage in that time."

There was a moment of silence, then the struggling sounds began. "Don't touch me! Jess yelled.

Nick looked in just in time to see Mitch straighten. "You bit me!" He raised his hand to hit her, and that when Nick attacked.

He went in like a wild man, the bat making contact with Mitch's back. Mitch turned to him, a mixture of surprise and anger on his face. Unfortunately, he was a quick thinker, and tackled Nick before he could get another swing in. The bat went flying, as the two fell to the floor.

Mitch straddled Nick, while punching Nick wherever he could get. Neck held his arms over his face for protection, taking a few blows to the ribs. They knocked the breath out of him, but he wasn't going to let that stop him. Mitch pulled back for another hit, giving Nick a chance for one of his own. He got Mitch in the gut, and didn't let up.

Nick wasn't sure how it happened, but somehow they were both off the ground, and fighting for the upper hand. They knocked into furniture, some things crashed to the ground. Nick lost his footing, and Mitch took that opportunity to push him back down.

Mitch went for Jess. "You're mine!"

Wrong move! Nick thought as he flew at him. He grabbed him in a chock hold. Mitch struggled to get Nick's arms from around his neck, but eventually, Mitch's legs gave out, and Nick went full on crazy man. He was on top of Mitch, his hands around his neck.

"You are the dumb one! For thinking I would ever let you hurt her again!" Nick said the words with a snarl. All his anger was with him now. Every time his heart broke over what Mitch did to her. All the tears, the self-doubt. The fear. All the anger that he felt toward Mitch, made Nick see red. He was going to kill, Mitch, and he couldn't stop himself.

….

Schmidt and Winston didn't waste time on the elevator. Schmidt was talking to Nick, when Nick abruptly hung up, saying something about Mitch. Putting two and two together didn't take much. They burst through the loft door, and could hear Jess begging for Nick to stop.

They both ran to the room to find Nick strangling Mitch. Schmidt had never seen that crazed look on Nick's face before, and Jess was yelling frantically at Nick, but she was tied to a chair.

"Nick!" Winston said, trying to pull Nick off Mitch who was turning dangerously red.

"I'm gonna kill him!" Nick fought back.

"Nick, he's not worth it. Your needed here!" Schmidt put in, going in to help Winston.

They managed to pull Nick away, and Mitch gasped for air. "Crazy!" he croaked, pointing at Nick.

This, of course, made Nick fight to get back at him, but he looked over at Jess, and all that anger seemed to melt away. It was replaced with concern.

…..

"Are you okay?" Nick asked, falling to his knees in front of her. He searched her face for marks, but there wasn't any. Her untied her as quickly as he could.

The moment both her hands were free, she through them around Nick. Because Winston had taken Mitch out of the room, she allowed the tears now. "I was so scared!"

"I told you, I will never let him hurt you."

Jess pulled back to look at him. His eye was going to be black and blue, and that cut lip would likely reopen anytime he talked. "I was scared for you, Nick. I thought you were going to kill him."

Nick blinked a couple time, realizing she had witnessed a side of him neither of them knew existed. "I would do anything to keep you safe."

Jess looked into those eyes that held such sincerity, it made her heart skip a beat. "I believe you."

Nick smiled, then stood and held out his hand for her. Together they went to the living room where Nick was being arrested by Winston's new partner. Jess let go of Nick's hand, and walked right up to him. "This. Is. Me." she said. Proud that her voice didn't shake.

She went back to Nick, and carefully kissed him on the lips. She didn't even care about the blood. "Thank you. For helping me find me."

Nick did his half smile that made her heart flutter like a kids. "Anytime Jessica Day."

….

Three Months Later

Jess smiled as she drank her coffee. This was her third day as a teacher as Grace Lanes Middle School. It was good to be a teacher again. She felt like she had a purpose again, and that was a great feeling. Her life felt like it was back on track.

"Morning," Nick said, as he kissed her. He was still have asleep with his hair all a mess, but she loved the look. She loved everything about the man who not only saved her life, but her identity. Because of him, she was recovering who she was.

"Morning," She replied with a smile.

Her eyes followed him as he went over to his desk. He came back, placing what she quickly realized was a manuscript in front of her. She read the title and that was enough to make her tear up a little. 'When Wounds Run Deep' was in large bold print. Underneath that in a smaller print said, 'The story of the bravest woman I know.'

"I told you I wouldn't send it to the publisher before you've read it."

"You actually wrote it."

Nick laughed. "Yeah, and it turned out pretty great." He kissed her cheek. "I'm going to go shower."

Jess nodded as she looked at the manuscript. She opened it to the first page which was a note from the author.

This isn't the kind of story I would usually right. For those who've read my previous works know this. But what else do you do when your whole world is changed by an event? When everything you've been vaguely aware of, comes and smacks you in the face? I've always considered myself a decent man, and while I've never condoned the abuse of woman in anyway, I feel like until this past year I never understood just how much of it goes on. This story is inspired by true events. A woman who is close to my heart lost herself to a man. This is her journey back to herself.

Her phone alarm made her jump a little, and she laughed at herself as she quickly packed up her things. She called out goodbye to Nick, before leaving.

Jess read the book any change she got throughout the day. She was stunned to know just how much Nick knew her. It was like there were times when he could hear her thoughts, so he wrote them down. He listened to her. Cared about her. Knew her most intimate fears and hopes. She could have been the one to write this.

She finished it later that night. It left her feeling both proud and vulnerable. This was her life out there for everyone to see, but it could do a lot of women good to see that you can come back from it.

"You finished it?" He looked anxious.

Jess through her arms around his neck, giving him a big kiss. "I love you, Nick Miller."

Nick smiled that smile that was only for her as he wrapped hers arms around her. "I love you too, Jessica Day." Nick kissed her again.

"Publish the book," she told him later that night as they snuggled in bed. She was in the comfort of his arms, him behind her, holding her to him, but she knew that it pleased him to hear those words.

"Are you sure?"

She turned to him, giving him another kiss. "Yes. I thought I would hate it, but I don't. You're a great writer, Nick. You should be proud of that."

Nick blushed as he smiled. "I'm going to marry you someday."

Jess laughed, but her heart fluttered. She thought back to when she thought she was pregnant, and Nick proposed to her. The look on his face when she said no would forever break her heart. But she truly didn't think she could ever feel the way she felt now. Sure, there were moments when she felt fragile, and she did have nightmares, but she felt whole again. And Nick was there for the bad stuff. In the moments when she felt like she would shatter, he held her together. When the nightmares came, he soothed her.

Jess fell asleep on his chest, knowing that everything would be okay. Knowing that one day, she was going to marry him.

…

Jess and Nick arrived at the hospital after everyone else. Jess took a seat next to Cece, while Nick stood with Schmidt. Winston came out a few minutes later to tell them that Aly was having some trouble, but the doctor was sure she was going to be fine. Winston on the other hand was a different story. He looked like he was going to be sick.

He was saying how he couldn't lose Aly when a nurse came for him. They were ready to start the pushing. It was another hour before Winston returned with a huge smile on his face. "Seven pounds, three ounces and twenty inches! Baby boy Bishop was born at three O Five am."

After all the congratulating was over, they were able to go see Aly and the baby. He was precious, and Jess teared up a little when she got to hold him. She thought she'd have one of her own by now. This was just another reminder of how her life derailed. Nick cooed at the baby from over her shoulder, making her smile. He would make a great dad. Even if the thought scared him.

"So, have you settled on a name?" Jess asked, tearfully.

"Daniel. Daniel Billy Bishop." Aly replied. She had a proud expression on her face.

"Look what we made," Winston said, as he took Daniel from Jess and brought him back to Aly. They two smiled down at their bundle. Everyone silently agreed that the two needed their time with him.

On the way back to the loft, Nick took Jess' hand. She looked over at him with a smile. "One day," he said.

Jess' heart fluttered at the idea. Yeah. One day.

…

"I need this to be perfect," Nick told Schmidt and Winston. "I want to do it on the beach as the sun is setting."

"Romantic," Schmidt approved. "Where did you come up with that?"

"The Island. She did a lot of her healing there. And I feel it fits."

"Are you going to make a day out of it?" Winston asked.

"Yeah, I figured we could all go. Have a beach day. Have lunch in one of those restaurants that cost way to much just because they are near the beach. Then once the sun starts going down I will suggest we go for a walk. It's going to be perfect."

"Do you think she will say yes this time?" Schmidt asked.

Nick thought about it. Schmidt had a point. He had asked her before, but that was for the wrong reasons. Yes, he loved her then, but she was in a bad place, and it wasn't the best timing. Now? Now she was on her way to being healed, and he was sure she would say yes this time. And if she didn't? He would kiss her, tell her that it's okay, then ask again in the future. He was willing to wait forever for her. "Yes, I do believe she will."

Nick looked over at the pictures on Schmidt's wall. "I just got the best idea!"

Schmidt and Winston both looked at him with questioning eyes. "And?" Schmidt prompted.

"We can do a photo shoot. Ill hire a photographer to take picture of all of us so she doesn't suspect anything, but this way we can have pictures of it." Nick smiled happy with himself. Jess would love having the pictures.

"I've gotta say, you came up with a great way to propose," Winston complemented.

"I did, didn't I?"

…..

Cece pulled off her ring to wash her hands, and cussed as the damn think fell off the sink into the trash can next to it. Squeamishly she reached in to find it. It was mostly tissue paper, but she came across something that caught her eyes. She pulled it out, and her mouth dropped. So that's why Jess had been acting strange for the last week or so.

Cece finished washing her hands before making her way back to the living room where Jess was. "So, anything new?" she prompted.

Jess looked over at her, and she was amazed how Jess showed no sign of the news on her face. "Nothing much." she yawned.

"Tired?"

Jess nodded. "Yeah. I've been so drained the past few days." She turned her attention back to the show.

"Sleepy huh? How about tender breast, frequent urination and a missed period?"

Jess looked over at her with surprise in her eyes. "How did?"

"I saw the pregnancy test in the bathroom. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was still trying to process it myself. And I'm freaked about telling Nick. I'm not sure if I'm ready for this."

Cece smiled and took Jess' hand. "Babe, you're ready."

Jess looked over at Lana, who was fast asleep on the couch. "I think I am. I've wanted this for a long time."

They embraced. "You're going to be a mommy!"

"I know," Jess replied, emotional.

"When are you going to tell Nick?"

"After my appointment Thursday. I want to be sure before I hit him with this."

"You're more likely to have a false negative than positive." Cece reminded her.

"I know, but I still want to be sure. Besides, I need that time to prepare." Jess laughed nervously.

"You will both be great parents."

Jess laughed again. "I'm going to be a mom!"

…..

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks :D**


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